Dodie hated the card wall with a passion unlike anything else.

The card wall was a space on the wall in her classroom where each kid had their own card, and whenever they were in trouble, or had a warning, they had to switch to a different color. Green meant you were a good student, while yellow indicated a warning, and red, of course, meant you'd gotten into some trouble. Dodie had never been anything but a green card, but that was no longer the case after today, and she wanted to do nothing else but run home and cry but she had to wait for her mom to come pick her up and talk with the teacher. Sitting in the hallway right outside the classroom, Dodie recognized her mothers jingling keyring instantly and looked up to see Regina approaching her. Regina knelt down in front of Dodie, reaching out and touching her face.

"Are you okay?" she asked softly, "What happened?"

"I don't know," Dodie muttered, "I got in trouble."

The classroom door opened and Dodie's teacher, Ms. Spink, peaked outside and smiled upon seeing Regina.

"Mrs. Hurks, please, come in," she said, stepping aside and allowing Regina to stand back up and enter the classroom, shutting the door behind them. Regina squeezed herself into one of the kids desk chairs and put her purse on the floor beside her while Ms. Spink walked back around to her seat behind her desk and pulled it out, sitting down in it. She glanced up at Regina and raised an eyebrow.

"I feel like a giant," Regina said, making the both of them chuckle; she cupped her hands on the desktop and looked at Ms. Spink, asking, "So...what's the situation? Why have I been called in?"

"Dodie's always been a great student," Ms. Spink said, "She's polite, she's studious, she's friendly, and as a result she's never once had to swap her card on the board. But after today..."

"What happened today exactly?" Regina asked and Ms. Spink sighed, shaking her head.

"I know it's been a hard few months for your family, given your husbands sudden death, and I know this has hit Dodie in particular extremely hard," Ms. Spink said, "but this afternoon, your daughter punched another girl in the mouth on the playground, and turmoil or otherwise, we simply cannot allow violence at the school of any kind from anyone."

Regina didn't know what to say. Dodie had never once acted out or been remotely violent, and she was shocked to hear this. She didn't even know how to respond. In fact, she was simultaneously mortified and surprised when she started laughing, not that Ms. Spink found it funny.

                                                                            ***

"Boy you really like horses," Palmer said as she laid on Sarah's bed, the both of them looking up at the posters she had pinned to the ceiling. Sarah just shrugged and laughed.

"It's an illness," she said, "I need a horserectomy."

Palmer cracked up and then rolled onto her side, looking at Sarah as she reached over and put her fingers in Sarah's hair. Sarah blushed and rolled onto her side as well, facing Palmer.

"I hope this okay, I'm really new to this dating stuff," Palmer said.

"You didn't date in high school?"

"I went on one date and it was for a friend because he didn't have one to a party," Palmer said, "Otherwise no, I stayed home, hung out with my sister, chilled in my room, whatever. I've never been too big into the whole social interaction thing."

"It can be exhausting, you're not wrong," Sarah said, "but I think you're doing okay."

"...does your family care at all?"

"What, about being queer? No," Sarah said, "They've known longer than I have I think. If anything, I think they're relieved, I think they were getting worried at one point that I was gonna be the sole lonely cat lady of the family. Well, horse lady, but you get the point."

Palmer chuckled and rolled back onto her back, looking back up at the ceiling, surprised when Sarah suddenly mounted her, sitting on her and looking down at her. Sarah bit her lip, grinning, before leaning down and kissing Palmer, who happily kissed her back.

"I'm sorry I'm so awkward," Palmer whispered after, "it's been a strange year."

"I understand."

"I'll be okay with being more public with things once my father's been gone a while longer, but...I just...I don't wanna put too much change on my mother as it is, you know?"

"I get it, it's cool, you don't have to explain yourself to me," Sarah said, leaning back in, kissing her again, letting her lips trail up Palmers neck to her ear where she whispered quietly, "I like you with or without the explanations."

Palmer had never felt so appreciative of another person.

                                                                         ***

Regina was driving home, Dodie in the backseat, after the meeting. All she could think back to was the moment she lost her cool in the classroom, and how awkward she felt. She sighed, rubbed her forehead and then pulled over to the side of the road, near a fast food place.

"Why are we stopping?" Dodie asked, pulling her headphones off cautiously.

"Doodlebug, I need to ask you something," Regina said, turning around in her seat, "...why did you hit that girl?"

Dodie shrugged.

"No," Regina said, "no, that's not an answer. Ms. Spink says it was because of something she said, so what did she say? What did she say that was so awful that made you feel the only course of action was to physically punish her for her words?"

Dodie sighed, rolling her head as she looked out the window.

"...she said dad died to get away from us, because we're losers," she finally said.

"...Dodie," Regina said, reaching back towards her, putting her hand on Dodie's leg, adding, "I just...I want you to know how proud I am of you for standing up for yourself and your father and...and even though I am proud, what you did wasn't okay in the grounds of being at school and cannot happen again, understand? Yes, you should never let someone be that cruel to you, but you should also never physically attack them when they do so."

Dodie and her mother locked eyes and Dodie slowly nodded. Regina patted her daughters leg, turned back around to face the windshield and smiled.

"Let's go get some ice cream," Regina said.

                                                                           ***

Palmer, true to her word, had never been in a relationship. Much like she'd never had sex before that time a few weeks prior, she'd also never dated someone regularly. It wasn't that she didn't have crushes or romantic inclinations, it was also that she just, as she had flat out said to Sarah, didn't have much interest in social interest with her peers. Even now, in college with Arthur and Anita, she always felt like the odd one out, much as she did appreciate their friendship.

But sitting here at the dinner table, with Sarah and Sarah's family, Palmer couldn't help but feel that sense of warmth that came from being with people who loved one another. A feeling she hadn't felt in ages, long before her father died. Last time she'd felt this was maybe when she was in 6th grade. As Sarah's mom, Roberta, piled more broccoli onto Palmers plate, Palmer thanked her politely before putting her napkin on her lap.

"How's your mother doing?" Sarah's father, Allen, asked.

"She's actually doing alright, it seems, all things considered," Palmer said, "My sister, I think, is the one being hit the hardest."

"How are you handling it?" Roberta asked, seating herself beside Allen and digging into her food.

"...I...I don't know, nobody's ever really asked me," Palmer said, "I guess I'm...angry? I'm not sad, and I feel bad for being sad, but I'm just not. Dad and I had a weird relationship, especially the older I got, so I think that sadness gave way to anger and resentment, you know? So now I'm mad, both that he's gone and that I'll never get the chance to fix things with him."

"That makes perfect sense," Allen said, wiping his mouth with his napkin and nodding, "It's understandable for some people to get lost in the shuffle when something like this happens, so I'm not surprised you're not being asked. My father had a heart attack when I was in my third year of college, and, same as you, we had a complicated relationship and I didn't even attend his funeral as a result. People were outraged, but I did what was best for me."

Palmer smiled. She appreciated Allen's kindness and understanding.

"You girls have any plans for tonight after dinner?" Robert asked, spearing a piece of chicken with her fork and raising it to her mouth.

"I was gonna take her to The Hidden Library," Sarah said.

"Where's that?" Palmer asked.

"Well, telling you wouldn't make it hidden now would it?" Sarah replied, all of them laughing.

Oh yes, it wasn't her family, but Palmer felt more accepted here than she did at home these days, and that was something she desperately needed and was eternally grateful for. Indeed, after dinner had finished, the girls got their jackets and Sarah drove them to a place called The Hidden Library, and, much to Palmer's surprise, it wasn't just a cute name, it actually was a library and it actually was hidden. The Hidden Library was put behind an old record store right next to a park, and tucked away in the very back of the shopping complex with trees hanging over it. They parked and walked across the lot into the building.

"This place is so cute, I've never even noticed it," Palmer said.

"Most people haven't, which is weird cause it's been here forever," Sarah said, "Like, the only reason my mom knew about it and showed it to me was because she worked here as a teenager in high school. It's always been special to me, but now you're special to me, so I wanted to show it to you."

Palmer blushed, but tried to hide it, which only made Sarah giggle harder. Palmer was not used to being treated so well by someone, and certainly not used to accepting compliments. They kept walking through, simply perusing with their eyes.

"It's really quiet and cozy in here," Palmer finally said, and Sarah nodded.

"It is. It's one of the few places besides the stables that I feel completely at ease within," Sarah said, taking one of Palmer's hands and adding, "Come on, I'll show you where they keep the horse books."

Palmer had never really been on a date, but as far as first dates went, she figured this was pretty darn good.

                                                                              ***

"You laughed?" Adam asked, "I'm sorry, you laughed at her? What could've possibly possessed you to do such a thing? Here she is telling you your child has violently struck another child, and your first inclination is to laugh? God you're sick, and that's why I like you."

Regina smirked as she paced in the living room, wine glass in hand while Adam sat on the couch, sipping his own wine. Regina tossed her hair and shook her head.

"It just happened, I can't explain it," she said, "part of it was just general nervousness, you know what that's like, right? Where you just..your body has a bizarre adverse reaction to something you can't control? That's what this was. But..."

"But the other part?" Adam said, and Regina bit her lip.

                                                                                 ***

"What happened today exactly?" Regina asked and Ms. Spink sighed, shaking her head.

"I know it's been a hard few months for your family, given your husbands sudden death, and I know this has hit Dodie in particular extremely hard," Ms. Spink said, "but this afternoon, your daughter punched another girl in the mouth on the playground, and turmoil or otherwise, we simply cannot allow violence at the school of any kind from anyone."

Regina didn't know what to say. Dodie had never once acted out or been remotely violent, and she was shocked to hear this. She didn't even know how to respond. In fact, she was simultaneously mortified and surprised when she started laughing, not that Ms. Spink found it funny.

"Do you find this funny?" Ms. Spink asked, and Regina shook her head.

"No, no I'm...god, I'm sorry, I just...I guess when your family falls apart, you start to have trouble caring about what other places worry about. I mean, my daughter lost her dad, my daughter was in a horrible car accident and somehow survived and now feels guilty that her dad was the one who died, and you're calling me in - me, someone who lost my husband of many years - to inform me that my daughter, probably justified in doing so, hit another girl in the mouth and I'm supposed to care? I know it's wrong, I know I'm supposed to care, but...I have a fridge full of leftovers from well meaning neighbors and friends and two daughters who are struggling to survive day to day life. I am alone, now on a somewhat fixed income, and will soon have to find work to support us because I guarantee what my husband left behind and what the insurance will pay out will not be enough forever, and you expect me to care about a playground spat?"

Ms. Spink's eyes widened. She was surprised at Regina's lack of professionalism, especially when she'd always come off as professional in the past.

"Well, considering it's against school policy, yes I think that-"

"Policy bullshit my ass," Regina said, standing up, "You know what should be against life policy? Taking apart a family and then expecting them to still maintain a facade of 'everything is fine' for the rest of the world. My family is broken, and the school expects us to react accordingly? I know what she did is wrong, I understand that and yes, it should never happen again, but that doesn't mean I'm going to treat it with the upmost seriousness when right now the true seriousness of my situation revolves around the death of my longtime husband and my daughters father. I have been putting up with so much bullshit from various institutions, from insurance companies to now schools, that I've just about had my goddamn fill of it. I'll tell her she wasn't in the right to do it, obviously, but I'm not gonna make her feel bad about defending herself. I refuse to breed fear of defense into my child because a school says I should. You'd think, being a teacher, you would understand that."

And Regina turned and rushed out of the room, slamming the door behind her. She leaned against the wall, covering her face with her hands, trying not to cry. She finally opened her eyes, pulled her hands away and looked towards the chair where Dodie was seated, and smiled.

"Am I in trouble?" Dodie asked.

"Sweetheart, we're all in trouble," Regina said, taking her by the hand and leading her to the parking lot.