Nelly locked her car and exhaled, blowing her curly black bangs from her face. She turned on her heel, raised her coffee cup to her lips and started walking towards the entrance, when she heard footsteps coming up beside her. Before she knew it, Harvey was walking alongside her, his hands behind his back.
"You often get your coffee outside of work? Our coffee isn't good enough for you?" he asked playfully, making her smirk.
"Actually no, it isn't," Nelly said, "I keep the cheapest coffee stuff here so I can buy the nicer stuff for my apartment. I'm sorry to break it to you, but there's no perks in that area."
"That's a shame, cause if you're not doing nice things for us, now I feel awkward for giving you these," Harvey said, pulling his hands out from his back, holding a large bouquet of multicolored tulips in front of himself. Nelly stopped and approached them, reaching out and gently touching the petals, smiling weakly. Her eyes eventually ran up from the flowers to Harvey, who leaned in and kissed her. She didn't hesitate, and did reciprocate, but she also broke it off quickly.
"Listen," Nelly said, "this is a sweet gesture and...and the other week was...actually the last week in general has been amazing, but we're in an employee/employer relationship, I could get in a lot of trouble for taking advantage of that."
"Oh, you after my job? Cause you're the one in charge here, not sure what advantage you're taking really," Harvey said, "after all, I've always been of the opinion that you need to relax, and I'm glad you've not only taken my advice but decided to take it with me of all people."
Nelly chuckled and touched the flowers again, biting her lip.
"You're...amazing," Nelly said, "really, and I've wanted this for so long, you have no idea-"
"By the way you're acted I have some idea," Harvey interrupted.
"-but...I really could get into a lot of legal trouble. Nobody is supposed to fraternize with eachother, especially not upper management," Nelly said.
"So you....don't want the flowers?" Harvey asked, making her laugh again.
"They're beautiful," Nelly replied.
"You're beautiful," Harvey remarked, surprising her as he kissed her again, whispering as he held her face gently in his free hand, "and...you have to take these, because they're making my allergies act up, so."
Nelly laughed and graciously accepted them, the both of them continuing into the zoo. Meanwhile, in the small water feature with the stone aquatic creature decorations further into the zoo, Robin, Fletcher and Kacie were sitting on the rim of the fountain, each having their respective 'breakfast'. Kacie was eating a premade bowl of eggs, sausage and cheese while Fletcher drank coffee and Robin had her usual breakfast burrito. Fletcher was reading a local newspaper as they sat together.
"There's this great place a little past downtown, I'm telling you, you have to go there, they have the absolute best hashbrowns. Believe me, I take breakfast extremely seriously, and the way they cook bacon so it's just the hint of crispiness, spectacular. I'm a breakfast expert," Robin said.
"Says the woman eating a gas station breakfast burrito," Fletcher said, taking a sip of his coffee.
"Listen, quality doesn't take precedent when you have responsibilities and, for what it's worth, I'll have you know these are surprisingly high quality," Robin replied, taking a large bite and chewing, making Fletcher chuckle. Suddenly Sophie plopped herself down beside Robin and rested her head on her shoulder. Robin blushed and, using her other hand, reached up and stroked her hair.
"This is one my favorite spots, which is funny, cause I'm not big on water," Sophie said.
"Then why do you like it?" Fletcher asked.
"I think I like the sound of water," Sophie said, "it's very comforting, especially when it's gentle like a fountain. Soothing. I have this white noise machine at home that I use when I start to get overwhelmed, and it plays all these different sounds, and one of my favorites is a fountain, so I think that's why I like it. It's also just pretty and very shaded over here."
Robin nodded in acknowledgement.
"All valid reasons," she said, before adding, "I have a tour to give today, you wanna join me?"
"You like having an assistant?" Sophie asked, and Robin kissed the side of her head.
"I do when they're as cute as you," Robin remarked, making Fletcher roll his eyes.
"Oh god you're so precious I think I might actually hurl, and I didn't even eat breakfast," Fletcher said.
***
"Listen," Nelly said as she and Harvey entered her office, Harvey shutting the door behind him as he entered following her, "there's rules that I've clearly broken here, and now I'm trying to do the right thing and set it right, meaning that this, what we've currently been engaging in, cannot continue."
Nelly tossed her coffee cup in the trashcan by her desk before turning to face Harvey as she leaned back against it.
"Because," she continued, "...well, because it can't. Simple as that."
"Wow, the ol' because I said so, thanks mom," Harvey replied, making her grimace.
"In light of what we've been participating in, please don't call me mom," she asked.
Harvey started pacing, chewing on his nails, while Nelly gathered a small container to fill with water and set on her desk with which to place the flowers into until she could take them home with her later. She watched him pace, nervous about what he might say. She'd wanted him for so long, and now here she was, pushing him away, and for what? Because the rules of management say you don't fraternize with your employees? He was such a great guy, and she was willing to throw that away for longevity at the company? Stupid. Even she knew it was stupid.
"So did it mean anything? Cause it meant a lot to me," Harvey finally said, turning to face her across the desk.
"...it meant everything," Nelly whispered back, "you have honestly no idea how long I'd wanted that, but...but we could both get into so much trouble if anyone found out. It's different when it's two employees doing it, but I'm literally your boss, and while that might be a fantasy for you, it's still a dangerous situation. We could both get fired or worse."
Harvey seated himself in the chair across from her and sighed, scratching the back of his head, adjusting his small round spectacles.
"Nell, you're so...you put too much stock into pleasing those around you, those who, for the record, wouldn't pleas you for a split second if the tables were turned. You want to do right but the company, but not by yourself. That hurts my heart. Because all I see when I look at you is a scared woman who is lonely, who just wants what we all want, to be loved, and yet you won't allow yourself to be for fear that 'the company' might find out. Nelly...I need you to think about why you feel the need to put your own needs behind the needs of a corporation. I know that it has to do with your job, wanting to keep your job, and I respect that aspect because god knows we all need fucking income, but at the same time, Nell, I..."
Harvey hesitated, bit his lip then continued.
"...I can't tell you how many countless times I've walked by your office and heard you crying. Do you just think you don't deserve to be loved? Did someone instill this belief in you that you're not worthy of it? Where did it come from? Cause it sure as fuck ain't true. Why won't you allow yourself some comfort?"
"I did, and now look at what it's led to," Nelly said, causing Harvey's eyes to soften.
"...oh. Well, I'm...I'm sorry. I didn't...I don't want to cause you trouble," Harvey said, standing up and heading for the door; as his hand gripped the knob, he stopped and looked at his shoes before adding, "...I didn't realize I led to problems. I don't want to cause any more."
And with that, Harvey exited the office, leaving Nelly standing alone behind her desk, chewing her lip, trying not to cry.
***
The tour had ended, and Sophie was surprisingly good with young kids, Robin had noticed. The tour hadn't dispersed, however, most were still lingering. It was a school group from a local middle school, so they were either hanging out around various animal exhibits or talking to the teachers and chaperones. Sophie had gone to get two bottles of water and had rejoined Robin at the tables near the Tigers Den, a small area that was outfitted for young kids to play in, with large plasticine tiger models to climb on and engage with. Robin thanked Sophie for the water, uncapped it and took a very long drink, wiping her mouth on her arm.
"You're really good at your job," Sophie said, making Robin blush.
"Well thank you," Robin replied, "I try to be. I try to be informative as well as entertaining. I know from growing up that the best way to learn about something is to not be condescended to, so I try to follow that same middle ground."
"You'd have made a good teacher," Sophie said, "before I got privately tutored, none of my teachers were ever patient or understanding enough with me."
Robin would've responded, in fact she had a response locked and loaded, ready to go, but her eye had been caught by a young girl from the tour - she looked to be about 12 - sitting on the concrete by the side of a water fountain shaped like a tiger head. Robin stood up and started to walk towards her, Sophie quickly following on her heel. As they got closer, Robin could see the girl was hiding her face in her arms, on top of her knees, her legs having been pulled up to her chest. Robin knelt down beside her, but didn't reach out to make contact.
"Hey," Robin said gently, "are you okay? Do you need some help?"
"They're gonna go extinct," the girl cried into herself, "and nobody cares."
Robin and Sophie exchanged a look, and both sat down cross legged in front of the girl.
"The tigers, you mean?" Robin asked, "There's lots of different tigers, they won't all go away. I mean, it's bad that people don't care more, yeah, that they'd rather focus on industrialization than preservation, but that's what places like Wild Kingdom is for, to help save and maybe even maintain the species population."
"They all go away," she continued to cry; after a minute she looked up at them, wiped her eyes on her palms and sniffled; just from her face, Robin and Sophie could tell this girl wasn't like her peers, and clearly had a developmental disorder of some kind. She continued, "they went away at home too."
"Tigers...went away at home?" Sophie asked, and the girl nodded.
"I had a tiger," she said, "I had him for so long, and now he's gone too. We moved and I don't know where he went."
Robin and Sophie exchanged a look and both stood up. They walked a little ways away from the fountain and lowered their voices.
"She's lost a comfort item," Sophie said quietly, "I know cause I've had this happen to me. Do we sell any tiger plushes in the gift shop?"
"We sell a ton of stuff in the gift shop, couldn't hurt to investigate. You want to go check while I stay here with her?"
"We'll take her together," Sophie said, making Robin nervous, her eyes widening.
"Are you suggesting we just...walk off with a child that isn't ours?" she asked, laughing nervously.
"We're employees, we have every right to kidnap children," said Sophie, making Robin crack up and nod. Together they walked back to the young girl, told her to go with them, and began to lead her away from the fountain and her class and towards the gift shop. Robin didn't know why, but she had a feeling Sophie understood this girl better than she ever would, and this only raised more questions for her. For as much as she loved her, Robin didn't really know much about her, and she was starting to wonder if she should.
***
Fletcher was sitting in the break room when Harvey entered and walked right to the fridge. Fletcher looked up, but only barely, just to see Harvey open the fridge and pull out a glass soda bottle, untop it then down the whole thing in one go, causing Fletcher to raise an eyebrow.
"You okay?" Fletcher asked.
"Is anyone?" Harvey replied.
"How philosophical of you," Fletcher retorted.
"I don't get it," Harvey said, walking to the table and seating himself, "I just...why do people act like they want things, then immediately take it back? I'm so tired of being misled by everyone I ever come into contact with. I try to do the right thing, you know, I try to be a good person, be helpful, supportive, understanding, and yet it just continually backfires in my face."
"That's why I don't do those things," Fletcher said, "and yet here you are, same as me. People are fickle, man. I think it's hard to really build trust with someone. It's hard enough to let your guard down, but it's even harder to do so in the hopes of reciprocation. That girl, Kacie? She's way cool, but I'm always ready for the other shoe to drop. Relationships are weird, whether they're platonic or romantic. Don't think too deeply into it."
"Just makes me feel worthless," Harvey mumbled, and Fletchers eyes softened, as though this hurt his heart to hear. He reached out and put a hand on Harvey's shoulder, causing Harvey to look over at him.
"That's cause you are," Fletcher said, the both of them laughing.
Harvey liked Fletcher for this very reason. He didn't take a single thing seriously, and that helped keep himself in check. He figured Fletcher was right. If Nelly really wanted what she claimed she wanted, she'd make that move when she was ready and comfortable. Sure, it hurt to be relegated back to just 'employee' status instead of 'potential love interest', but Harvey did understand her reasoning, and he did feel as though pressuring it was the wrong thing to do. Nelly was already constantly under stress to be perfect. The last thing he wanted to do to her was add onto that. So he drank his soda and he talked to Fletcher and he tried not to take life so seriously.
One day at a time, he figured.
***
"When I was your age, probably younger," Sophie said as they walked through the gift shop, heading to the stuffie rack, "I had a favorite plush too. It was a very fuzzy blue elephant. I named him Roger. Roger went everywhere with me. Even to school, which...well...didn't go over so well. But having Roger around made me feel safe. Is that what it was like with your tiger? Did he have a name?"
"I called him Stalker," the girl said, nodding, "cause Tigers stalk things, that's how they hunt. And yeah, I took him everywhere, but I also liked having him at home. When mom and dad would start fighting, I'd get under the covers with Stalker and hug him and read until they stopped."
"What do you like to read?" Robin asked.
"They're just picture books, cause I can't read well," the girl replied, "I like looking at the pictures."
They finally stopped at the plush rack and the girl hesitated, seeming nervous. Sophie put a hand on her shoulder and knelt down beside her, smiling warmly.
"Here's the deal, you're gonna go pick out a new tiger, and you're not even gonna have to pay for him, I'm going to do that for you," Sophie said, surprising Robin with this act of generosity; she continued, "and you can take this one home, he'll be all yours, and it'll still be sad to have lost Stalker, but at least you won't be without a tiger. Does that sound good?"
The girl nodded excitedly, and Sophie patted her on the back, pushing her to the racks. The girl ran eagerly over to them as Sophie stood back up beside Robin and smoothed out her uniform. Robin shook her head in disbelief.
"Wow, this is a selfless thing you're doing," Robin said, "do you get a good discount? Cause if not, I can chip in too."
"I was like her," Sophie said quietly, "...parents always arguing, always having trouble in school, making friends out of inanimate objects. She clearly has a developmental disorder. I know what that's like. That's partially why I was pulled out of school and tutored. Having those comfort items helps a lot, because when you feel so alone, it's nice to have something that feels like it's there just for the sake of you. Especially nice when your family won't stop fighting all the time."
Robin reached over and gently held Sophie's hand, squeezing gently.
"What were they fighting about?" she asked.
Sophie waited a minute, chewing her cheek before answering.
"Me," she whispered, "they were fighting about me."
***
Harvey was walking back to his car after work, pulling his keys from his coat pocket. Everyone else had left about an hour ago, but he'd stayed behind to do some paperwork for everybody, filling out necessary employee worksheets that were required once a month in regards to their qualifications. Harvey didn't mind doing this though, and it wasn't like any of them were taking advantage of him by letting him do so. First off, he liked it because he'd rather do that than go home and feel awful, and secondly, it let his mind be anywhere other than where it currently had been. He needed the break, mentally. As he jammed his car key into the door and opened it, he heard the sound of heels coming up slowly behind him, and he turned to see Nelly.
"Yeah?" he asked, "I left all those papers in the necessary spot, if that's what you're here to talk about."
"I have to apologize to you," Nelly said, her voice wavering, like she was on the verge of tears, "...ever since taking over this job, the animals have been my biggest priority. It was always my dream to run a zoo, you don't...you don't understand. Like, ever since I was really little, since the first time I'd ever been taken to one, it was my dream. So to actually be offered that opportunity, pffft, unreal. That's why I'm so scared of losing it, Harvey."
"I understand, and I...for what it's worth, Nell, I don't...I'm not mad at you. I'm slightly disappointed at the situation, but I'm not mad, and I totally get it," Harvey said.
"No, you don't," Nelly said, getting closer, "because...because all I do is work. That's it. That's the one thing I do. I come here, I work, I go home, I work. I work and I work and I work for the safety and the sanctity of these animals, to prove that I'm capable of this job because, guess what, it isn't permanent. This is an interim position. Nobody knows that. I could be replaced in a heartbeat if I screw up."
Harvey leaned against his car and folded his arms, clearly his throat, nodding.
"Yeah, okay, you're right, I didn't know that, that's...that's stressful," he said.
"So I go into every single day with the knowledge that if I'm not fucking exceptional, I could be out. To live with that stress, my god, it changes you, man," Nelly said, "...but there's so much more that I want. When I don't go home and work, I just go home and cry. I go home, and I make food and I eat and I will lay on my couch and watch my TV on mute and just sob uncontrollably because...because I'm so fucking alone. I'm so alone, Harvey. I need to be the best for my job because I can't be the best for a person. That's been proven repeatedly, and I...I don't want you to prove it to me too."
"Fucking hell, Nell, I never could," Harvey said, stepping forward off the car, putting his hands on her shoulders, "Nelly, I never could do that to you. Nelly, I don't think you understand how I see you. I know you're overworked, stressed out, scared, but I also see a completely capable woman who is doing her goddamned best, and...and she deserves to feel safe and heard and loved."
Nelly looked up from her shoes at Harvey and blushed. Harvey reached up with one hand and pushed her hair back behind one of her ears, then rubbing her cheek with his palm.
"I've always been attracted to you just because you're the kind of woman I find admirable, someone who doesn't take any shit and doesn't let any shit stop her, that and you're extremely beautiful and funny and..." Harvey said, "...and the other week, I was so happy when that happened cause I'd wanted it for a long time."
"I'd wanted it too," Nelly said.
"Then let yourself have it," Harvey whispered, "and if anyone gives you shit about what we're doing, I'll go to bat for you, even if it means the loss of my job at the sake of preserving yours."
"...you would do that for me?" Nelly asked, shocked.
"I would," Harvey said, "because, honestly, I like animals but this is just a job to me. But it's your lifes passion. That's worth protecting."
The two of them stood there in the parking lot in silence, before Nelly reached up and put her hand on Harvey's on her face.
"You should come to my apartment," she whispered.
"That sounds like a great idea," he whispered back, leaning in and kissing her.
Nelly was all those things Harvey said he saw her as, but she was also so much more. She was things she never let anyone see her be. Romantic and fun and easygoing. She wanted to share that part of herself with Harvey because she knew he was safe, and after the last relationship she'd had, safety was what she needed most. So he followed her back to her apartment, and they cooked dinner together, and they watched an old black and white movie on TV and they cracked wise throughout the whole thing, and for the first time since she'd gotten her job, Nelly felt something she hadn't felt in years.
Comfortable.
And she sure as shit wasn't about to let that go.
"You often get your coffee outside of work? Our coffee isn't good enough for you?" he asked playfully, making her smirk.
"Actually no, it isn't," Nelly said, "I keep the cheapest coffee stuff here so I can buy the nicer stuff for my apartment. I'm sorry to break it to you, but there's no perks in that area."
"That's a shame, cause if you're not doing nice things for us, now I feel awkward for giving you these," Harvey said, pulling his hands out from his back, holding a large bouquet of multicolored tulips in front of himself. Nelly stopped and approached them, reaching out and gently touching the petals, smiling weakly. Her eyes eventually ran up from the flowers to Harvey, who leaned in and kissed her. She didn't hesitate, and did reciprocate, but she also broke it off quickly.
"Listen," Nelly said, "this is a sweet gesture and...and the other week was...actually the last week in general has been amazing, but we're in an employee/employer relationship, I could get in a lot of trouble for taking advantage of that."
"Oh, you after my job? Cause you're the one in charge here, not sure what advantage you're taking really," Harvey said, "after all, I've always been of the opinion that you need to relax, and I'm glad you've not only taken my advice but decided to take it with me of all people."
Nelly chuckled and touched the flowers again, biting her lip.
"You're...amazing," Nelly said, "really, and I've wanted this for so long, you have no idea-"
"By the way you're acted I have some idea," Harvey interrupted.
"-but...I really could get into a lot of legal trouble. Nobody is supposed to fraternize with eachother, especially not upper management," Nelly said.
"So you....don't want the flowers?" Harvey asked, making her laugh again.
"They're beautiful," Nelly replied.
"You're beautiful," Harvey remarked, surprising her as he kissed her again, whispering as he held her face gently in his free hand, "and...you have to take these, because they're making my allergies act up, so."
Nelly laughed and graciously accepted them, the both of them continuing into the zoo. Meanwhile, in the small water feature with the stone aquatic creature decorations further into the zoo, Robin, Fletcher and Kacie were sitting on the rim of the fountain, each having their respective 'breakfast'. Kacie was eating a premade bowl of eggs, sausage and cheese while Fletcher drank coffee and Robin had her usual breakfast burrito. Fletcher was reading a local newspaper as they sat together.
"There's this great place a little past downtown, I'm telling you, you have to go there, they have the absolute best hashbrowns. Believe me, I take breakfast extremely seriously, and the way they cook bacon so it's just the hint of crispiness, spectacular. I'm a breakfast expert," Robin said.
"Says the woman eating a gas station breakfast burrito," Fletcher said, taking a sip of his coffee.
"Listen, quality doesn't take precedent when you have responsibilities and, for what it's worth, I'll have you know these are surprisingly high quality," Robin replied, taking a large bite and chewing, making Fletcher chuckle. Suddenly Sophie plopped herself down beside Robin and rested her head on her shoulder. Robin blushed and, using her other hand, reached up and stroked her hair.
"This is one my favorite spots, which is funny, cause I'm not big on water," Sophie said.
"Then why do you like it?" Fletcher asked.
"I think I like the sound of water," Sophie said, "it's very comforting, especially when it's gentle like a fountain. Soothing. I have this white noise machine at home that I use when I start to get overwhelmed, and it plays all these different sounds, and one of my favorites is a fountain, so I think that's why I like it. It's also just pretty and very shaded over here."
Robin nodded in acknowledgement.
"All valid reasons," she said, before adding, "I have a tour to give today, you wanna join me?"
"You like having an assistant?" Sophie asked, and Robin kissed the side of her head.
"I do when they're as cute as you," Robin remarked, making Fletcher roll his eyes.
"Oh god you're so precious I think I might actually hurl, and I didn't even eat breakfast," Fletcher said.
***
"Listen," Nelly said as she and Harvey entered her office, Harvey shutting the door behind him as he entered following her, "there's rules that I've clearly broken here, and now I'm trying to do the right thing and set it right, meaning that this, what we've currently been engaging in, cannot continue."
Nelly tossed her coffee cup in the trashcan by her desk before turning to face Harvey as she leaned back against it.
"Because," she continued, "...well, because it can't. Simple as that."
"Wow, the ol' because I said so, thanks mom," Harvey replied, making her grimace.
"In light of what we've been participating in, please don't call me mom," she asked.
Harvey started pacing, chewing on his nails, while Nelly gathered a small container to fill with water and set on her desk with which to place the flowers into until she could take them home with her later. She watched him pace, nervous about what he might say. She'd wanted him for so long, and now here she was, pushing him away, and for what? Because the rules of management say you don't fraternize with your employees? He was such a great guy, and she was willing to throw that away for longevity at the company? Stupid. Even she knew it was stupid.
"So did it mean anything? Cause it meant a lot to me," Harvey finally said, turning to face her across the desk.
"...it meant everything," Nelly whispered back, "you have honestly no idea how long I'd wanted that, but...but we could both get into so much trouble if anyone found out. It's different when it's two employees doing it, but I'm literally your boss, and while that might be a fantasy for you, it's still a dangerous situation. We could both get fired or worse."
Harvey seated himself in the chair across from her and sighed, scratching the back of his head, adjusting his small round spectacles.
"Nell, you're so...you put too much stock into pleasing those around you, those who, for the record, wouldn't pleas you for a split second if the tables were turned. You want to do right but the company, but not by yourself. That hurts my heart. Because all I see when I look at you is a scared woman who is lonely, who just wants what we all want, to be loved, and yet you won't allow yourself to be for fear that 'the company' might find out. Nelly...I need you to think about why you feel the need to put your own needs behind the needs of a corporation. I know that it has to do with your job, wanting to keep your job, and I respect that aspect because god knows we all need fucking income, but at the same time, Nell, I..."
Harvey hesitated, bit his lip then continued.
"...I can't tell you how many countless times I've walked by your office and heard you crying. Do you just think you don't deserve to be loved? Did someone instill this belief in you that you're not worthy of it? Where did it come from? Cause it sure as fuck ain't true. Why won't you allow yourself some comfort?"
"I did, and now look at what it's led to," Nelly said, causing Harvey's eyes to soften.
"...oh. Well, I'm...I'm sorry. I didn't...I don't want to cause you trouble," Harvey said, standing up and heading for the door; as his hand gripped the knob, he stopped and looked at his shoes before adding, "...I didn't realize I led to problems. I don't want to cause any more."
And with that, Harvey exited the office, leaving Nelly standing alone behind her desk, chewing her lip, trying not to cry.
***
The tour had ended, and Sophie was surprisingly good with young kids, Robin had noticed. The tour hadn't dispersed, however, most were still lingering. It was a school group from a local middle school, so they were either hanging out around various animal exhibits or talking to the teachers and chaperones. Sophie had gone to get two bottles of water and had rejoined Robin at the tables near the Tigers Den, a small area that was outfitted for young kids to play in, with large plasticine tiger models to climb on and engage with. Robin thanked Sophie for the water, uncapped it and took a very long drink, wiping her mouth on her arm.
"You're really good at your job," Sophie said, making Robin blush.
"Well thank you," Robin replied, "I try to be. I try to be informative as well as entertaining. I know from growing up that the best way to learn about something is to not be condescended to, so I try to follow that same middle ground."
"You'd have made a good teacher," Sophie said, "before I got privately tutored, none of my teachers were ever patient or understanding enough with me."
Robin would've responded, in fact she had a response locked and loaded, ready to go, but her eye had been caught by a young girl from the tour - she looked to be about 12 - sitting on the concrete by the side of a water fountain shaped like a tiger head. Robin stood up and started to walk towards her, Sophie quickly following on her heel. As they got closer, Robin could see the girl was hiding her face in her arms, on top of her knees, her legs having been pulled up to her chest. Robin knelt down beside her, but didn't reach out to make contact.
"Hey," Robin said gently, "are you okay? Do you need some help?"
"They're gonna go extinct," the girl cried into herself, "and nobody cares."
Robin and Sophie exchanged a look, and both sat down cross legged in front of the girl.
"The tigers, you mean?" Robin asked, "There's lots of different tigers, they won't all go away. I mean, it's bad that people don't care more, yeah, that they'd rather focus on industrialization than preservation, but that's what places like Wild Kingdom is for, to help save and maybe even maintain the species population."
"They all go away," she continued to cry; after a minute she looked up at them, wiped her eyes on her palms and sniffled; just from her face, Robin and Sophie could tell this girl wasn't like her peers, and clearly had a developmental disorder of some kind. She continued, "they went away at home too."
"Tigers...went away at home?" Sophie asked, and the girl nodded.
"I had a tiger," she said, "I had him for so long, and now he's gone too. We moved and I don't know where he went."
Robin and Sophie exchanged a look and both stood up. They walked a little ways away from the fountain and lowered their voices.
"She's lost a comfort item," Sophie said quietly, "I know cause I've had this happen to me. Do we sell any tiger plushes in the gift shop?"
"We sell a ton of stuff in the gift shop, couldn't hurt to investigate. You want to go check while I stay here with her?"
"We'll take her together," Sophie said, making Robin nervous, her eyes widening.
"Are you suggesting we just...walk off with a child that isn't ours?" she asked, laughing nervously.
"We're employees, we have every right to kidnap children," said Sophie, making Robin crack up and nod. Together they walked back to the young girl, told her to go with them, and began to lead her away from the fountain and her class and towards the gift shop. Robin didn't know why, but she had a feeling Sophie understood this girl better than she ever would, and this only raised more questions for her. For as much as she loved her, Robin didn't really know much about her, and she was starting to wonder if she should.
***
Fletcher was sitting in the break room when Harvey entered and walked right to the fridge. Fletcher looked up, but only barely, just to see Harvey open the fridge and pull out a glass soda bottle, untop it then down the whole thing in one go, causing Fletcher to raise an eyebrow.
"You okay?" Fletcher asked.
"Is anyone?" Harvey replied.
"How philosophical of you," Fletcher retorted.
"I don't get it," Harvey said, walking to the table and seating himself, "I just...why do people act like they want things, then immediately take it back? I'm so tired of being misled by everyone I ever come into contact with. I try to do the right thing, you know, I try to be a good person, be helpful, supportive, understanding, and yet it just continually backfires in my face."
"That's why I don't do those things," Fletcher said, "and yet here you are, same as me. People are fickle, man. I think it's hard to really build trust with someone. It's hard enough to let your guard down, but it's even harder to do so in the hopes of reciprocation. That girl, Kacie? She's way cool, but I'm always ready for the other shoe to drop. Relationships are weird, whether they're platonic or romantic. Don't think too deeply into it."
"Just makes me feel worthless," Harvey mumbled, and Fletchers eyes softened, as though this hurt his heart to hear. He reached out and put a hand on Harvey's shoulder, causing Harvey to look over at him.
"That's cause you are," Fletcher said, the both of them laughing.
Harvey liked Fletcher for this very reason. He didn't take a single thing seriously, and that helped keep himself in check. He figured Fletcher was right. If Nelly really wanted what she claimed she wanted, she'd make that move when she was ready and comfortable. Sure, it hurt to be relegated back to just 'employee' status instead of 'potential love interest', but Harvey did understand her reasoning, and he did feel as though pressuring it was the wrong thing to do. Nelly was already constantly under stress to be perfect. The last thing he wanted to do to her was add onto that. So he drank his soda and he talked to Fletcher and he tried not to take life so seriously.
One day at a time, he figured.
***
"When I was your age, probably younger," Sophie said as they walked through the gift shop, heading to the stuffie rack, "I had a favorite plush too. It was a very fuzzy blue elephant. I named him Roger. Roger went everywhere with me. Even to school, which...well...didn't go over so well. But having Roger around made me feel safe. Is that what it was like with your tiger? Did he have a name?"
"I called him Stalker," the girl said, nodding, "cause Tigers stalk things, that's how they hunt. And yeah, I took him everywhere, but I also liked having him at home. When mom and dad would start fighting, I'd get under the covers with Stalker and hug him and read until they stopped."
"What do you like to read?" Robin asked.
"They're just picture books, cause I can't read well," the girl replied, "I like looking at the pictures."
They finally stopped at the plush rack and the girl hesitated, seeming nervous. Sophie put a hand on her shoulder and knelt down beside her, smiling warmly.
"Here's the deal, you're gonna go pick out a new tiger, and you're not even gonna have to pay for him, I'm going to do that for you," Sophie said, surprising Robin with this act of generosity; she continued, "and you can take this one home, he'll be all yours, and it'll still be sad to have lost Stalker, but at least you won't be without a tiger. Does that sound good?"
The girl nodded excitedly, and Sophie patted her on the back, pushing her to the racks. The girl ran eagerly over to them as Sophie stood back up beside Robin and smoothed out her uniform. Robin shook her head in disbelief.
"Wow, this is a selfless thing you're doing," Robin said, "do you get a good discount? Cause if not, I can chip in too."
"I was like her," Sophie said quietly, "...parents always arguing, always having trouble in school, making friends out of inanimate objects. She clearly has a developmental disorder. I know what that's like. That's partially why I was pulled out of school and tutored. Having those comfort items helps a lot, because when you feel so alone, it's nice to have something that feels like it's there just for the sake of you. Especially nice when your family won't stop fighting all the time."
Robin reached over and gently held Sophie's hand, squeezing gently.
"What were they fighting about?" she asked.
Sophie waited a minute, chewing her cheek before answering.
"Me," she whispered, "they were fighting about me."
***
Harvey was walking back to his car after work, pulling his keys from his coat pocket. Everyone else had left about an hour ago, but he'd stayed behind to do some paperwork for everybody, filling out necessary employee worksheets that were required once a month in regards to their qualifications. Harvey didn't mind doing this though, and it wasn't like any of them were taking advantage of him by letting him do so. First off, he liked it because he'd rather do that than go home and feel awful, and secondly, it let his mind be anywhere other than where it currently had been. He needed the break, mentally. As he jammed his car key into the door and opened it, he heard the sound of heels coming up slowly behind him, and he turned to see Nelly.
"Yeah?" he asked, "I left all those papers in the necessary spot, if that's what you're here to talk about."
"I have to apologize to you," Nelly said, her voice wavering, like she was on the verge of tears, "...ever since taking over this job, the animals have been my biggest priority. It was always my dream to run a zoo, you don't...you don't understand. Like, ever since I was really little, since the first time I'd ever been taken to one, it was my dream. So to actually be offered that opportunity, pffft, unreal. That's why I'm so scared of losing it, Harvey."
"I understand, and I...for what it's worth, Nell, I don't...I'm not mad at you. I'm slightly disappointed at the situation, but I'm not mad, and I totally get it," Harvey said.
"No, you don't," Nelly said, getting closer, "because...because all I do is work. That's it. That's the one thing I do. I come here, I work, I go home, I work. I work and I work and I work for the safety and the sanctity of these animals, to prove that I'm capable of this job because, guess what, it isn't permanent. This is an interim position. Nobody knows that. I could be replaced in a heartbeat if I screw up."
Harvey leaned against his car and folded his arms, clearly his throat, nodding.
"Yeah, okay, you're right, I didn't know that, that's...that's stressful," he said.
"So I go into every single day with the knowledge that if I'm not fucking exceptional, I could be out. To live with that stress, my god, it changes you, man," Nelly said, "...but there's so much more that I want. When I don't go home and work, I just go home and cry. I go home, and I make food and I eat and I will lay on my couch and watch my TV on mute and just sob uncontrollably because...because I'm so fucking alone. I'm so alone, Harvey. I need to be the best for my job because I can't be the best for a person. That's been proven repeatedly, and I...I don't want you to prove it to me too."
"Fucking hell, Nell, I never could," Harvey said, stepping forward off the car, putting his hands on her shoulders, "Nelly, I never could do that to you. Nelly, I don't think you understand how I see you. I know you're overworked, stressed out, scared, but I also see a completely capable woman who is doing her goddamned best, and...and she deserves to feel safe and heard and loved."
Nelly looked up from her shoes at Harvey and blushed. Harvey reached up with one hand and pushed her hair back behind one of her ears, then rubbing her cheek with his palm.
"I've always been attracted to you just because you're the kind of woman I find admirable, someone who doesn't take any shit and doesn't let any shit stop her, that and you're extremely beautiful and funny and..." Harvey said, "...and the other week, I was so happy when that happened cause I'd wanted it for a long time."
"I'd wanted it too," Nelly said.
"Then let yourself have it," Harvey whispered, "and if anyone gives you shit about what we're doing, I'll go to bat for you, even if it means the loss of my job at the sake of preserving yours."
"...you would do that for me?" Nelly asked, shocked.
"I would," Harvey said, "because, honestly, I like animals but this is just a job to me. But it's your lifes passion. That's worth protecting."
The two of them stood there in the parking lot in silence, before Nelly reached up and put her hand on Harvey's on her face.
"You should come to my apartment," she whispered.
"That sounds like a great idea," he whispered back, leaning in and kissing her.
Nelly was all those things Harvey said he saw her as, but she was also so much more. She was things she never let anyone see her be. Romantic and fun and easygoing. She wanted to share that part of herself with Harvey because she knew he was safe, and after the last relationship she'd had, safety was what she needed most. So he followed her back to her apartment, and they cooked dinner together, and they watched an old black and white movie on TV and they cracked wise throughout the whole thing, and for the first time since she'd gotten her job, Nelly felt something she hadn't felt in years.
Comfortable.
And she sure as shit wasn't about to let that go.