Helena came here at least once a month.

She stood in front of the headstone and she stared, silent and stoic, she tried to think of what she and her son might talk about had he survived. Had he still been here. Hands stuffed in her coat pockets, one clenching a hankerchief tightly in her first, she just simply couldn't fathom that this was a thing she had to live with every day for the rest of her life. She heard the sound of footsteps nearby, seemingly approaching, but she didn't make much of it. Assumed it was a groundskeeper, perhaps, or just another family member coming to pay their own person respects. She sniffled and tossed her hair, exhaling, her eyes red. Suddenly the footsteps stopped and she turned her head slightly to see John standing there, surprising her, her eyes widening a bit at the sight of him.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, "how did you even know where I was?"

"I didn't, actually," John said, "I came here to see my wife. Saw your car in the lot, figured I'd look around for you."

Helena nodded, as John stared at the headstone in front of them.

"How'd he go?" John asked, before shaking his head, "Sorry, that...maybe that was too blunt, too direct, I apologize, maybe you don't wanna talk about it. Kinda personal. Just sorta slipped out. After losing my wife, I used to go to these meetings for a while, ya know, a coping with grief and loss sorta thing, and that was how people usually started their interactions with you, so I guess it's second nature now."

"You stopped going?" Helena asked, still not looking at him.

"I did, eventually," John said, "figured I was better off handling it on my own. Turns out I wasn't. Turns out handling it on my own meant drinking until I blacked out. But then I remembered Star still needed me, and I stopped drinking again. I guess that's why I asked you. I know how isolating it can feel, and make you want to be, so I didn't want you to go down the same path is all."

"Don't worry, I've never really been one for vices," Helena said, making him smirk, which made her blush; she exhaled and added, "it, uh...hah, it was my fault. I took him to work with me. Shouldn't have, but I did. And...and he got sick."

"He got sick at work?" John asked, confused.

"He got sick from another one of the children there, thanks to those lunatics who don't believe in vaccinating their kids for the benefit of everyone. My son died because of one idiots personal unfounded disbelief in science, or pseudo science, if you want to be specific, because let's be honest, what they knew didn't hold any scientific merit. He got sick. He was already compromised, he didn't have a strong immune system himself. He got worse. He tried so hard to fight it off, but...but nothing ever seemed to really take."

John held his hand, palm open, down by his side, and was admittedly somewhat surprised when Helena grasped it in her own, squeezing.

"Watching him waste away," she continued, on the verge of tears, "that was worse than anything else I could've seen happen to him. He so badly wanted to get better, but his own body was so against him. Made me scared, in turn, to ever care again, cause, well, now I'd seen what happens to people I loved."

"Yeah, it...it can be hard to believe it's worth it after losing someone that meant the world to you. If your world can so easily be ripped from your arms, why bother, right?" John asked, looking down at his feet, "I get it."

A few moments passed, and neither said a word. After a bit, Helena just exhaled and rested her head on John's shoulder. John blushed a little and just stayed quiet, holding her hand tightly, letting it all wash over them. It had been a hard year. He missed Alexis like hell, and taking care of Ellen while getting to know her was hard, but well worth doing. Still, it was nice to have an honest to god parent to talk to about these things. Odd thing was, though, he'd rarely if ever felt guilty about Star surviving the crash until now, but seeing how destroyed emotionally Helena actually was, while hiding it at all times, tugged at his heart. At least, he figured, she didn't have to be alone.

***

Lilian sat on the couch in front of her laptop staring at the screen.

She knew what she wanted to type, but was unsure how to do it. How does one uncover buried information such as the stuff she was specifically after? She finally flopped backwards into the couch and sighed deeply, just as Miranda came into the room.

"You're tellin' me," Miranda said, making Lilian smile; Miranda continued, "what are you trying to do?"

"Gregg asked me if I'd ever looked up the family of the woman who killed herself on the monorail tracks," Lilian said, as Miranda seated herself beside her on the couch now; Lilian added, "I never had even considered it really, before, but now it's like...all I can think about."

"You sure you wanna do down that rabbit hole? Who knows where it could lead. I mean, ultimately it's your decision, and I'll support whatever choice you make, but I just...I want you to be careful, that's all," Miranda said, and Lilian smiled, resting her head on Miranda's shoulder.

She had thought about that, how could she not, after all? The possibility of it being awful. Of it being the worst possible thing to do. To dredge up another families pain and loss, all for the sake of her own shot at closure to her curiosity of an incident that was only tangentially related to her? Course, that was ridiculous. One could call it tangential, sure, but in all honesty it had directly affected the course of the rest of her life, determined her future, so she felt she had just as big a stake in it. Lilian sighed and rubbed her eyes.

"I don't know," Lilian said, "remember when we went to see your family, your mom, sister?"

"Mhm."

"Didn't it feel good to sort of, you know, come to terms with things that made you who you were?" Lilian asked and Miranda narrowed her eyes a bit.

"Lily, um...I mean this in the nicest sense, but...that didn't make me who I was, or am. I was this way no matter what. They were around me, yes, had a bit of an impact on how I dealt with it, but I was who I am and always would be, regardless of their level of inclusion, do you get that?" Miranda asked and Lilian shrunk further into herself on the couch, her voice a weak whisper now.

"...sorry..." she muttered.

"No no, sweetheart, don't be sorry, goodness, it's...it's a complicated combination of things, being me, for anyone like me too," Miranda said, chuckling, pulling Lilian in and kissing her gently on the side of the head, "but it's not the same. What happened to you changed who you were. I was always going to be who I am, no matter the influence of those around me. That's all I'm saying."

Lilian nodded, as a knock came at the door. Miranda sighed, got up and headed to the door as Lilian sat back upright and hunched over her laptop once again. Miranda opened the door...only to find her sister Kate standing there.

"...how did you even know where-"

"Mom wrote down your address when you were there, remember?" Kate asked, "Can I...come in?"

Miranda stepped aside, allowing her sister entry. She looked even thinner than she had before, her eyes dark underneath, her hair losing its luster. She looked frail, she sounded weak. Tired.

"Well, what are you doing here?" Miranda asked.

"...I know it's...sudden...but...can I...can I stay with you?" Kate asked, surprising both women.

"I mean, we only have two bedrooms, and a kid is staying in one of them," Miranda said, "I...I suppose you could sleep in the living room, crash on the couch, but what would the reason be? Did something happen?"

"I'm scared of dad," Kate said, and Miranda nodded.

"Close the door, let's talk," Miranda said.

***

Maddie and Lux were sitting on an empty playground. It was an old playground, in Maddie's neighborhood where she had lived before she moved in with Lilian. Their bikes were laying against the monkeybars, and both girls were just sitting in the wood chips now, listening to the birds and looking around as they played absentmindedly with the wood chips beneath them. Maddie smiled.

"I used to love coming here," she said, "this was my favorite playground growing up. Mom and dad would bring me here, and it was just so big. Climbing up certain things felt impossible. Now...everything looks so small."

"I think that's part of growing up, stuff starts feeling smaller. The world, in general. It's supposed to make it less scary, but I just find it feels more confining, and that's scarier," Lux replied, making Maddie nod; Lux continued, "my brother made the world feel smaller, and now that he's gone, the world feels larger, cause what I knew is gone now."

"You sound sad about it," Maddie said.

"I am, and that sucks, cause I shouldn't be. He was doing awful things to me, but it was all I knew, so there was this weird messed up sense of security to it. I don't think I miss what he was doing, but I miss how small it made the world feel."

Maddie nodded again, understanding, and once more impressed by Lux's vocabulary. She was clearly a gifted student.

"My parents never abused me," Maddie said, "but my mom trying to kill my dad made me realize just how, like...fragile the idea of family is. But then, meeting Lilian...I don't know, I guess that made me realize how you can make a new family, you know? You don't have a brother, but...I could kind of be your sister, if you wanna think of me like that."

Lux smiled, pushing some of her hair back behind her ear and wrapped her arms around her knees, pulling her legs up into her chest.

"Do you think I should tell my parents?" she asked.

"About what he did?"

"Mhm. I don't want to ruin their memory of him, but..."

"He made that decision himself when he decided to do what he did to you," Maddie said, shrugging, "whatever people think of him now is his own fault. You should be able to heal. It's taken me a long time to start feeling like I can trust adults again, even with being with Lilian who's only ever worked hard to make me feel safe and loved and understood, but I'm getting there. I finally feel better than I have in a long time. You deserve that too."

"Did you..." Lux asked, biting her lip and tossing some wood chips away, "did you really mean that? About being my sister?"

"I did!" Maddie said brightly, holding her hands out, watching as Lux - reluctantly at first - reached out as well and took them in her own; Maddie added, "I always wanted a sister. We can be best friends."

Lux smiled tightly, on the verge of crying.

"I think I'm gonna tell them," she said.

"I think that's a good idea," Maddie said.

Despite her age, Maddie had lived through the worst of the worst, and now she was coming out swinging at the world, doing what she'd watched Lilian do, try to help other girls around her who'd been subjected to the same or worse. The world already did its best to hurt young girls, and she decided that she too would try to right that wrong, rectify that injustice. And she would start with her very own found sister.

***

"Death is...a fucking weird thing," Helena said.

She and John found themselves at a small deli near the cemetery, having brunch. Sitting inside in a booth, sandwiches and coffee in front of them both, she spoke while she sipped and John took bites, listening intensly. Helena continued.

"You think you're ready for it," she said, "you think that, you know, you'll be okay, you'll manage. The argument could be made that it's worse for those who get left behind, because, well, the ones who die are dead. Their pain is over. But our pain lasts until we die. It isn't fair to compare, it's just an interesting debate. My point, overall, is that death is a weird thing and we try to understand it; we compartmentalize all these feelings surrounding it, we try to rationalize aspects of it, but what good does that really do? Analyzing isn't healing."

"It can be a stepping stone to it though, you know? Ignoring is far worse, take it from me," John said, chewing and wiping his mouth on his napkin, he swallowed and added, "I think that's what's important to keep in mind. Nothing is a hinderance, everything can be turned into a way to help it along."

Helena smiled and took another long sip.

"I'm sorry we've argued so much," Helena said, "I think, you know, it's been hard for me to open up about things, especially while taking over the business. And, truth be told, I didn't expect to inherit a mess the way I did. This company is...I mean, it's fucked up, there's no other way to put it."

John and Helena started laughing.

"But," she went on, "I mean that in a good sense. I'd rather work with people than concepts of people. People too scared to be people. Everyone we work with is so authentically themselves, and after a lifetime of being in business, that's kind of refreshing honestly."

A long pause as two men passed by them, and a group of three middle aged women seated themselves in the booth behind them. After a bit, Helena looked at John again, who was playing with his spoon, stirring his coffee.

"...she'll come back, you know," Helena said, and John finally cracked, crying.

"She fucking better," he said.

Helena quickly scooted out from her side of the booth and edged into his side, sitting beside him, putting his arms around him. John leaned against her and cried as she rubbed his back, running her hand up into his hair now and then.

"I'm sorry John," she said, "it must hurt to have her just leave the way she did, but she did it for good reasons."

"I know," John said, "I know, that's...that's why I'm not upset with her. But she better come back, cause if she doesn't, I'll find her myself. Swear to god, I'll take a boat to the open seas and I won't stop until I've hunted her down like some kind of modern day Ahab."

Helena chuckled and rested her head against his. It'd been a very long time since she'd been this close to any man, and she'd never really known a man like John, who allowed himself to show emotions so openly in public. It was nice. Admirable, honestly. So they sat like that for a while, and she held him while he cried and talked about Alexis. She vowed then and there, though not audibly, to join him in his quest to bring Alexis back if she didn't return of her own accord.

After all, every captain needs a good first mate.

***

Lilian was sitting in the bedroom when Maddie came in. Lilian looked up from the bed, away from her laptop, and smiled at Maddie as she sat on the bed with her.

"Who is that woman in the living room?" Maddie asked.

"That's Miranda's sister," Lilian said.

"What are you doing?" Maddie asked.

"I am looking someone up, about something from when I was a kid," Lilian said, closing the laptop lid now before turning her focus to Maddie, asking, "...when I was a little girl, maybe a little younger than you, a woman died in front of me. Well, kind of. I was at an amusement park and she walked in front of the monorail. Killed instantly. She was an actress, performed at the theme park as a princess. I'm telling you this because I don't want you to let one moment define you. We are made up of a million moments that define us, not just one, okay?"

Maddie nodded, smiling. Lilian pulled Maddie into her side, wrapping her arms around her and kissing her head.

"Your birthday is coming up again," Lilian said, "any idea what you wanna do?"

"I don't know," Maddie said, "but I sure don't want a pinata."

And with that they laughed and laughed, and Lilian knew then and there that the kid would be alright.

John was standing on the docks, hands in his pockets. Ellen was seated on a bench back near the front of the area, opting instead to not be near the water. His eyes scanned the horizons, his hair blew gently in the wind. Footsteps approached, but he didn't even bother to look and see who they belonged to, the answer was obvious enough without that. Geena saddled up beside him and shook her head, hands also in her coat pockets.

"I know it's typical for sisters to take things from eachother," Geena said, "but I gotta say, stealing a boat really tops the list. That's...that's a new one."

John chuckled, then coughed, nodding. He didn't respond, but instead just stared dead ahead, chewing on his lower lip intermittently. Geena exhaled and looked at her shoes.

"She's not coming back," Geena said quietly.

"She will," John replied, "she said she would, and she wouldn't lie to Ellen."

"John, all she's done her whole life is lie, what makes you think-"

"You're conflating this behavior with who she was, not who she's become. The Alex we know now isn't the Alex you knew then, okay? She'll. Come. Back." John said, not even bothering to look at her as he delivered his statement. Geena nodded again, going back to being quiet. John was right, she knew, she just...it was hard for her to admit it now. She'd only known Alexis as someone else her whole life, and the woman she'd become since her overdose, since rehab, wasn't someone she'd gotten to truly know. She wish she had now, given her absence. Geena casually glanced back over her shoulder at Ellen.

"Does she talk about anything much?" Geena asked.

"Not really. Mostly keeps to herself. But I've got her eating, and that's good enough for now. She's in a place where she is safe and isn't screamed at, and really, I think that alone is an adjustment she'll need to get used to first before she opts to open up, even to someone as close to her sister as I was. You can try your luck though, if you feel so inclined."

Geena turned on her heel and headed back towards the benches, leaving John to his thoughts. As she approached, Ellen turned her head, but kept her eyes to the ground. Geena sat down beside her on the bench, and exhaled.

"What happened must've been...a lot," Geena said, "dad is gonna be in the hospital a while, he got pretty messed up, but he and mom are opting not to press charges. I think they know whole heartedly that if the police get involved, it would only get worse, specifically for them, so. I guess Alexis gets off scott free yet again for her actions."

"She's gone, she left everyone and everything she knew," Ellen said, finally looking up at Geena, their eyes locking as she added, quietly, "how is that scott free to you?"

Geena wanted to reply. Wanted to have an answer. But, again, as had just happened on the pier, she knew Ellen was right. So instead she kept her mouth shut, and she sat in the silence, letting the wind do all the talking.

***

"Not often I get treated to a theme restaurant," Lilian said, "thank you for the opportunity."

"Everyone should get to experience rampant capitalism disguised as a personalized interest at least once," Gregg said, making Lilian chuckle. She was surprised, to say the least, that Greg had asked her to lunch. Lilian was always under the assumption that therapists weren't exactly meant to fraternize with their clients. Then again, they had a very different kind of relationship than a typical doctor/patient situation, so maybe it was fine. Still, despite her relatively calm demeanor, she remained somewhat on edge, though she didn't show it.

"So what's good here?" she asked, looking through the menu as Gregg sipped his soda.

"Well," he said, smacking his lips as he lowered his glass, "I think that depends on your flavor palette now doesn't it?"

"So why did you want to have lunch with me?" Lilian finally asked, foregoing any kind of coolness about it, opting instead to approach it outright.

"I...need a favor," Gregg said, "and...well, given your profession, you're the only one I trust to do it right."

Lilian had to admit, he'd piqued her curiosity. She nodded, waiting, listening.

"My daughter is sick," Gregg said, "she has cancer, but...her birthday is coming up, and I guess I thought it'd be neat for her to have what you guys offer. I know it's not the kind of thing she would really admit to being into, but I do think she would enjoy it, and...I just...I want her to be happy for a day, you know?"

Lilian wanted to hug this man. His devotion to his daughter was nothing short of wonderful. If only all fathers could be like this; but she thought back to Maddie's father, and she smiled. Some were good dads, even if her own had been absent. Lilian looked down at her hands on the table and smiled weakly.

"My dad...wasn't really around," Lilian said, "he kind of took off, cause my mom was...well...let's just say she was hard to deal with for a long time. We're in a good place now, but for a long time she was selfish and obsessed with appearances, and not necessarily in a way that felt intentionally cruel, she didn't realize how the way she acted affected those around her that she loved, but it did cost her her husband. My dad. But I do remember going to the theme park with him, you know, back when that woman killed herself on the monorail, and I remember sitting with him earlier that day before that happened. I think mom was in a gift shop or something. Dad told me that the lack of absence didn't mean an absence of love. I think he felt guilty about how much he'd already distanced himself from the family, from my mother...from me, as a result, and I think he felt like he owed me some kind of explanation. But I didn't want an explanation. I just wanted my dad."

Lilian rose her sight back up to meet Gregg's, whose own eyes were swelling up with tears.

"Your daughter is very lucky," Lilian added, her voice breaking, "and we'd love to help you give her the best birthday she can have."

***

"So what would you like to do?" John asked, sitting with Ellen at a table at a nearby restaurant, the pier still in plain view as they awaited their order of seafood.

Geena had left to go to work, so now it was just John and Ellen. Ellen had barely spoken since being dumped on his doorstep, but the way he saw it that was just because she was still trying to process everything that had occurred, and not just that day but in general in her life. He knew what that was like, how long it could take.

"I don't really know," Ellen said meekly, "I don't...I don't know if I have interests. I don't know what I like."

"That's actually a good thing, you haven't been influenced and you're starting with a blank slate," John replied, smiling warmly at her as he added, "that means you can do anything you want, discover what truly interests you. Not everyone gets so lucky to have that option, especially at your age."

"Isn't it worse to be this...unformed at my age?" Ellen asked, making John shake his head as he sipped from his soda.

"Absolutely not," he said, "not at all. What's worse, to have to discover who you, what you like and what you want to do when you're an adult, or to have it all figured out for you when you're a child with no input or autonomy?"

Ellen knew the answer, and knew what point he was trying to make. She thought to her sisters. Geena had always been on a straight line to a clear goal, while Alexis - never really have a clear goal in mind - had floundered a bit, swapping between multiple things, but always ultimately winding up on her feet. Ellen wanted that for herself, that...that ability to keep pushing forward. She admired her sisters for their drive, even when things seemed their bleakest.

"I kind of...want to..." Ellen said, making John arch an eyebrow in curiosity to the remainder of the sentence forming in her mind; finally she finished, adding, "I want to help animals."

John smiled and nodded.

"That's noble, and if you wind up good at it a very well paying profession," John said.

"At the house, all I had were books," Ellen said, "and magazines. I would read a lot about animals. Sometimes I'd sneak down and watch TV about animals, nature documentaries and stuff. I liked that. I'd like to help animals. Animals aren't like people. I don't...I don't necessarily have the greatest opinion of humans at this point."

"Who could blame you, considering," John replied.

"But," she continued, "animals are just grateful for your presence, and your help, and they give you unconditional love if they get attached. I hate people but I love animals."

"Well," John said, stretching, "we can look into classes at the local community college, get you on the right track from there."

"Why are you doing this?" Ellen asked, causing John to pause as the waitress finally arrived, setting their food down between them. Once they were gone again, and John started to dig into his crab legs, he leaned back in his chair and thought about the question. After a long moment, he nodded, sighed and spoke while he chewed.

"When I met your sister," he said, "she was...a mess, I mean, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it, she was a mess. She was using heavily, drinking nonstop, and she didn't let any of that hinder her job, she was committed as hell and it was impressive, but she was...she was barely functioning outside of that. I saw, in her, I guess...a way to fix the damage that had been done to other young women thanks to the input, or lack thereof, of their parents, and I guess I just needed to do something about it, having been on the opposite end of that."

Ellen didn't exactly understand what he was referring to, but she didn't feel like pushing it.

"You're all more capable than you were led to believe," John said, taking her by surprise by his sudden change in tone, "it's just that you've been convinced otherwise. Granted, she had a near death experience to recover from as well, but still. If you want to help animals, then let's make that a reality. The strongest thing you can do, Ellen, is get hurt to hell and back and still give a shit."

Ellen wanted to cry. No "adult" had ever spoken to her like this before, in a way that was simultaneously comforting and supportive, while still being serious but not judgemental. Suddenly she saw what Alexis saw, why she'd entrusted her to this man. And as she watched him eat his crab legs while she ate her Calamari, she couldn't help but think that, yeah, just because those people had mistreated her didn't mean everyone would. She'd had everything taken from her. Now it was time to give back.

***

"So," Lilian asked as she and Greg exited the restaurant and headed to the parking lot, "when is this birthday, when will our services be needed?"

"In a week," Gregg said, "hopefully that's enough time?"

"Absolutely, I can wrangle it together by then," Lilian said as they stopped by the cars while Gregg retrieved his keys; she leaned against the car and smirked, adding, "you know, they say that you aren't supposed to become friends with your therapist."

"Are we friends?" Gregg asked, "I kinda saw us more as twins, honestly."

"...how so?" Lilian asked, confused.

"Well," Gregg said, unlocking his car and placing his leftovers on the passenger seat, "maybe not in the typical sense, but...you wanted a dad, I wanna be a good dad, plus you and my daughter have a ton in common, not to mention your girlfriend has even more in common with her. Just kinda feels like...with a connection like ours, it would behoove us to be more than just patient and doctor, you know? That sort of thing only comes around every so often, and it'd be stupid to squander it."

Lilian smiled, wanting to cry. The last few weeks had been hard. Alexis bailing the way she did, with little to no notice, not to mention just everything going on with Maddie and her friend, and the company being under new management now. This felt good. This felt...necessary. It was important, she reminded herself, and okay, to slow down now and then.

"Lily," Gregg said, "you told me about Maddie's friend, the sister of the boy who died at her party? It got me thinking...did you ever...think to track down the family of the woman who killed herself at the park?"

"...why would I do that?" Lilian asked, genuinely confused.

"It's important to face things. Her death didn't just impact, presumably, her own family but it impacted you as well," Gregg said, "I just think it could be a worthwhile thread to tug at, that's all, if you're interested."

Gregg hugged her, and she happily hugged him back before watching him pull away and go around to the drivers side of the car, pull the door open and get in. He closed the door behind him, then started the car up and she watched him pull out and drive away, waving at one another as he did. Lilian chewed on her lip and thought, as she waved, about what he'd mentioned. Maybe he had a point. Maybe it was something she should finally face. She'd never really thought of it as having that much of an impact on her life, but...it had. It'd caused her to want to be a princess, and to wind up in the career she was currently invested in. That was impact, even if it didn't feel like it. Lilian got back to the apartment and found it empty. Maddie, Lux and Miranda had gone out to the park, leaving Lilian some alone time. She pulled out her laptop and quickly got to work, doing some searching online for information regarding the woman who'd jumped in front of the monorail. No matter what she did though, no matter what she typed or what she tried to access, nothing returned her the information she was after. The name of the woman was never mentioned, not once.

After an hour or so, Lilian finally exhaled and put her face in her hands. How would she even find this information? Was it even accessible? Was it smart to pull at this thread, as Gregg had put it? After all, she had no idea what it might unravel, and what if...what if it wasn't worth unraveling? What then?

Meanwhile, back at home, Ellen was asleep, taking a nap on the couch while John sat in his armchair and watched. His eyes were wet. He wanted Alexis back so badly, her absence hurt so much. But then he smiled, rubbing his face with his palm, as he watched Ellen roll over in her sleep. If someone had to be the parent to these girls, might as well be him. After all, he had the experience.

That was the thing nobody seemed to notice, what Gregg had said at lunch, was that everyone involved with this company, with eachother, seemed to just be mirrors of one another, twins, in a way. And that couldn't be anymore clear than with Lux and Maddie, who were sitting in swings at the park while Miranda read a book on a nearby bench. Each girl had suffered tremendous loss, and abuse, at the expense of their supposed "loving family", but now they'd overcome, and found one another.

"I'm thirsty," Maddie said, "let's go to the fountain."

She got off the swing and, Lux by her side, began walking towards the nearby water fountain. Stopping at it, Maddie pressed the button and started drinking as Lux watched, leaning against it, arms folded.

"It's nice," Lux said, "having people who care about me. I mean, not that my parents don't love me, but..."

"No, I get it. My dad loves me so much, but it's nice to know you're worth something to adults who aren't your parents," Maddie said, making Lux laugh and nod in agreement.

"Or, not even adults," Lux said, "it's nice just having you around. Someone like you. Who understands how much it hurts."

"I definitely understand," Maddie said.

Maddie and Lux locked eyes, and for a moment, Maddie swore she saw a flicker of something in Lux's face that she recognized when she saw Miranda and Lilian look at one another. Maddie then held out her arms, and Lux hugged her. The girls stood there, by the fountain, just hugging for minutes on end. Twins didn't need to be fraternal. Twins could be anyone who matched you. And nobody matched eachother the way these girls matched eachother.

If that isn't love, what really was.

Alexis couldn't stop shaking.

She was sitting in her apartment on her couch, with Ellen in a loveseat across the room and Rick picking up the place, likely to keep himself from losing it, and was unsure what exactly it was she was feeling. Some sort of fucked up liberation? Perhaps. But it felt deeper than that. More...raw. Visceral. Alexis looked over at Ellen, who was sitting with her legs pulled up to her chest, hugging them tightly and shaking a little herself. Rick was the only one, seemingly, who appeared from the outside to be somewhat stable. After a bit, he finally stopped and looked around the apartment, then exhaled.

"A damn shame to leave this place," he said, "it's pretty nice."

"Leave?" Alexis asked, looking at him.

"Well, you can't stay here, someone is going to come looking for, presumably the police. You did assault a man, after all. Now, granted, self defense and there were 3 of us who witnessed the whole thing, plus it isn't like your parents are patron saints of virtue in societies eyes, but still," Rick said, as he walked over to Ellen and knelt in front of her, touching her arm as he looked back at Alexis, "is there anywhere you both can go?"

"...John," Alexis muttered, "Ellen can go with John."

"Okay, and what about you?" Rick asked.

"What about me?" Alexis asked.

"You need some kind of plan," Rick said, getting up and walking to the couch, sitting beside her, "we can either wait for the cops to come get us, we can flee but that makes us look guilty, or we can turn ourselves in. In the end they'll recognize, I think, that it was self defense, especially since it's three of us against them, but for the time being-"

"I don't care what happens to me," Alexis said, sniffling, "I just care what happens to her, and we've already got that figured out, so it doesn't matter now."

Rick wanted to help her. He wanted to save her. But Alexis knew best what was right for her, and ultimately, he wasn't going to fight her on that. Rick sighed and leaned back against the couch cushions, trying to relax. Alexis stared at the wall ahead of them, thinking of something entirely different though. She was thinking about the day she almost drowned. Her own parents hadn't seemed to care then, and maybe, in some twisted way, this was her revenge for their negligence. Sure, she wanted to save her sister, she could frame it as noble and heroic, but in the end, maybe she really just wanted to get back at the people who'd proven to her at such a young age just how disposable she actually was.

                                                                           ***

"Is it weird for your family to meet your therapist?" Lilian asked as she drove, "cause it feels wrong somehow. Not that I ever complain about you guys, but still. Therapy is supposed to be a private thing, and, for what it's worth, I have known him longer than I've known any of you."

"Did you hear that, Maddie?" Miranda asked, glancing to the backseat where Maddie and Lux were seated, "we aren't important enough to even be discussed in therapy."

"Rude," Maddie replied, the three of them chuckling.

"No, you know what I mean though," Lilian continued, laughing herself now, "like, two separate worlds. I talk to him cause I DON'T wanna dump everything on those around me. I don't wanna be Alex, basically, no shade to her. God knows I love the girl but she drags everyone around her into her nonsense and it's dangerous and exhausting. I don't want to put you guys through that. If I have a problem, I deal with it myself, or with a professional."

"We're a team, Lily," Miranda said, reaching over and putting her hand on her thigh, "you can depend on me, you can fall back on me, that's what I'm here for. What kind of partner would I be if I wasn't supportive emotionally? I mean, it's good to have a therapist, yes, but you need to know you can count on me too."

Lilian smiled and reached down, putting her hand atop Miranda's and squeezing gently. Lux, from the backseat, watched with a sort of quiet, introspective awe. This was what a family should be. She had no idea, however, that a family didn't have to be people you weren't actually related to. Course she'd always known about adoption, foster homes, that sort of thing, but it just never occurred to her, somehow, that people sometimes found eachother and decided then and there, hey, you're my family now, and that was very cool to discover firsthand. She looked at Maddie and smiled. Maddie had been such a good friend, inviting her into their home, and now she was being invited to important family functions. She felt...lucky. And after a number of years feeling like the unluckiest girl in the world, it was nice to feel lucky.

The car pulled up into Gregg's driveway and parked. Lilian exhaled anxiously, adjusted something in the rearview mirror, then got out of the car. Miranda walked around to her and took her hand, and they waited for the girls. Once the four of them were together, they all headed up the pebbled walkway and towards the front door.

"Why did he even invite us?" Maddie asked.

"Well, we ran into him at the hospital when Miranda was getting information about her SRS," Lilian said, "and we talked a little about what was going on lately, and he agreed to let us come see him tonight. We were kinda surprised too, to be honest. It seemed a little out of the blue. But we know that his daughter is like Miranda, so I guess he just sort of assumed it would be nice, which it will be."

"What is SRS?" Lux asked.

"Sex Reassignment Surgery," Miranda said, making Lux look even more confused.

"I'll explain it later," Maddie mumbled, and Lux smiled, nodding.

The thing was...Gregg had his reasons for inviting this particular group of women over, and by the end of the evening, Lilian would come to realize he probably needed to talk to her more than she needed to talk to him.

                                                                       ***

Rick had gone to get suitcases, while Alexis and Ellen were gathering clothes for Ellen, along with some other vitals. Alexis gave her a spare toothbrush, some toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, clothes she didn't wear anymore, as well as a hairbrush. All temporary of course, until she could manage to get her own, not that Alexis was going to want any of this back. She just didn't want her sister to be completely unprepared. Ellen was sitting on the bed watching Alexis gather items and dump them into assorted piles.

"This guy, John, is he nice?" Ellen asked.

"He's very nice, he adopted me legally," Alexis said, and Ellen's eyes widened.

"He did?"

"Mhm," Alexis continued, folding some clothes to put in the suitcases Rick would soon return with, "so don't worry when I say he'll be your best bet in taking you in. He has proven he would do literally anything for me."

"What about you? What are you going to do?" Ellen asked.

"I don't know yet," Alexis said, and she meant it. She had no backup plan. She had no recourse. No idea of what action should be taken her own benefit. All that mattered at this moment was ensuring the further safety of her sister. Ellen tugged at the tassels on her sweatshirt, frayed and weather from her fingertips and teeth, and she looked down at her lap.

"...why did you come?" she whispered.

Alexis sighed and sat on the bed beside her.

"Because," Alexis said, "mom and dad were never there for us. The only reason they kept you there was because they knew they could control you. Get you to get them what they needed or wanted without any backtalk. You don't deserve that. Geena and I were lucky enough to get out. You should be as well. You can do great things, Ellen, I know you can. You're smart and talented, and I know that with the right environment and support system, you could become the person you should've been instead of the husk they made you into. I love you either way, you're my sister, but I'd be so happy to watch you flourish."

Ellen was surprised. This wasn't the sister she remembered. Geena had always been loving, kind, compassionate. But Alexis...well, she hadn't been cruel or anything, but she'd been distant. She'd been somewhat standoffish. To hear her sister speak like this, she started to realize just how much she had grown, and a lot of that, likely, was thanks to her rehab. Alexis had nearly died herself, but she'd found a group of unlikely people who loved her no matter what, and were going to help her, outcome be damned. Now Alexis seemed to have taken that in full and turned it back around, giving it to her own sister, and Ellen had to admit...it felt good. Ellen smiled weakly as Alexis reached out and rubbed her back, feeling her spine through her sweatshirt and grimacing.

"You need to see a doctor," Alexis said softly, "your eating disorder has gotten so bad."

"I know," Ellen replied quietly, "and they made it almost impossible for me to eat, to gain weight."

"Well that's all gonna change now," Alexis said, smiling, as she pulled Ellen in for a hug. As she rubbed her little sisters back, Alexis could only think of two things...the first was how her sister would finally be safe, finally have the chance to grow, come into her own, the way Geena and Alexis had. The second...

...was about Geena's boat.

                                                                        ***

"You have a beautiful home," Miranda said to Gregg's wife, Kristen, who smiled, thanking her as she led the guests into the dining room. The house was filled with warmth, both from the heat of the kitchen, but also in a metaphorical sense. As Miranda, Lilian, Maddie and Lux followed Kristen through the doorway and into the dining room, Lilian couldn't help but feel like a somewhat inferior mother figure.

"Please, sit down," Kristen said, opening a bottle of wine for the adults and pouring some into each of their glasses, "it isn't often that Gregg has clients come to the house, so you must be something special."

"I'm not special," Lilian said.

"In the head, maybe," Miranda retorted, making Lilian snort with laughter and playfully hit her arm as she picked up her glass to take a sip, smacked her lips and then added, "actually, I don't think it's Lilian he wanted to see as much as it was me. I think I'm the one he was interested in."

Just then Gregg appeared in the doorway leading in from the hall, sighing, shaking his head.

"She doesn't feel well," he said, "she got a whole outfit together, but she just...doesn't feel well. And I can't blame her, considering."

He glanced towards the table, walked over, picked up his wine glass and drank the whole thing in one long gulp. Miranda chewed on her lip, then asked where the restroom was, and proceeded to stand up from the table and head down the hall. Thing was, she wasn't actually in need of the restroom. She was looking for Gregg's daughter. And she found her bedroom easily enough, after all it was the one room in the hall that had a door plastered in stickers and a few small posters and stick on glow in the dark stars. Miranda smiled and knocked lightly.

"Hey, uh...are you in there? I'm a friend of your fathers," Miranda said, "can I come in?"

A pause. Silence. Then a voice.

"You may enter," she said, and Miranda did. She shut the door silently behind her and reoriented herself to this kids bedroom. It was so girly, so feminine, so absolutely cute. Miranda was jealous, she had to admit. If she'd gotten to express herself this way when she was a child, maybe she'd be more at ease with her femininity nowadays. Either way, her eyes eventually landed on the bed, where a twelve year old girl was laying upside down across its frame. She raised her head and a single eye protruded from behind her long hair, staring up at Miranda.

"Hello," she said softly.

"Hi there," Miranda said, "mind if I join you? I'm an expert in moping."

Miranda then laid in the same position next to the girl and sighed, making the girl chuckle.

"Your dad says you're not feeling well," Miranda said, "wanna tell me what's up?"

"I don't even know you and I was told never to talk to strangers," the girl said.

"Oh, so talking to me is out of the question, but letting me come in your and lay on your bed, that's totally fine? Gotcha," Miranda said, "just glad to know where the boundaries are established, that's all."

The girl laughed louder this time, which made Miranda smile. Miranda had never told anyone this, not even Lilian, but the way she saw it, she always promised herself that if she could help another little girl who was like her feel better about herself, then she would jump at the opportunity. She knew, firsthand, what it was like to deal with this stuff on your own, and nobody, especially a child, deserved to feel that way. Miranda chewed on her lip, the tried a different approach.

"How about if I were to tell you that your dad invited me specifically to talk to you?" she asked, and that got the girls attention.

"He...did?" she asked, "why would he do that? That's so weird."

"It is weird," Miranda replied, laughing, "but his heart's in the right place. I wish more parents would do this sort of thing. Would know that, sometimes, the best help is outside help. Most parents don't have the necessities to cover everything their child goes through, and it's okay to seek that help through other adults, so long as they know and trust them, of course. Now me, personally, he shouldn't trust. I did kill like fifteen people," Miranda said, the girl laughing again, as Miranda smirked and continued, "but that doesn't mean I don't know what you're going through."

"It isn't fair," the girl said, "I got what I wanted, without any problems, and I should be happy."

"You're right, it isn't fair," Miranda said, "but that's what it is. But we can't help it, you know? Even when things are at their best, we can't help but feel a general feeling of unease or anxiety or outright unfairness due to our very specific predicaments. It isn't fair to have to go through this, especially with all of society watching, just to be yourself, but you're braver for it than they'll ever be."

The girl gave her a puzzled look and cocked her head to the side.

"What are you talking about?" she asked, "I don't have any problems with who I am."

"...oh. Then what are YOU talking about?" Miranda asked.

"It isn't the identity stuff that's bothering me," the girl said, "it's the cancer."

That, Miranda had to admit, hadn't been the answer she'd been anticipating.

Meanwhile, back in the dining room, while Gregg helped Kristen get the food from the kitchen and plate it before bringing it out to their guests, Lilian couldn't help but think about how beautiful this place was. What a lucky little girl Gregg's daughter was, to get to grow up in such a warm, safe, loving environment. A clean and quiet home. Securely tucked away from the awfulness that existed just beyond its walls. She sighed and finished her wine, then noticed Lux was looking at her.

"What?" Lilian asked.

"Are you jealous too? Cause I am," Lux said, and Lilian chuckled, nodding.

"Yeah, very," Lilian said, "I'm sad that I can't give Maddie and her friends a home like this. You likely come from a home like this, archtecturally speaking, but not filled with the same warmth, I'm guessing that's why you're jealous. I just feel inferior, like nothing I do is good enough. I'm always measuring myself up to the other women around me with kids, and I'm always feeling like I'm coming up short. It's very upsetting."

"You're doing fine," Maddie said, without even looking at them, "if you weren't good enough, my dad wouldn't let me live with you."

Lilian...hadn't actually ever considered that. She always sort of assumed that maybe he'd picked her simply because of ease of access, his childs history with her, familiarity, that sort of thing. But never once had she considered, though she very rightly should have, Maddie had proven now, that it was because he knew she was a stable, dependable individual capable of keeping a child safe and happy. After all, it was her job. She did it almost every day. Almost every day she went out to a party and she made sure the kids there were safe and happy. Lilian smiled and patted Maddie on the head as Lux leaned over and hugged Lilian, Lilian using her other arm to hug Lux back. She had, in fact, built a nice little family for them.

And she couldn't be happier with the result.

                                                                             ***

Ellen had been dropped off at John's with her things, and was now sitting outside his trailer, on a bench, kicking the ground in front of her with her feet nervously. Alexis had told her before she'd left how much she loved her, and how Geena would be checking in, and how everything would be okay, but the one she promised, which made Ellen confused, was that she would be back. She didn't even clarify on when or anything...just that she would be back. Now, sitting in the car with Rick as he drove, Alexis exhaled and knew what her next move would be. She ashed her cigarette out the window and turned her head to look at him. She smiled weakly.

"You're really ride or die, aren't you?" she asked.

"God I wish we could get to the die part already," Rick said, making her snort.

"I know what to do, Rick," Alexis said, "and...I need you to do it with me."

Rick pulled over to the side of the road and stopped the car, hands gripping the steering wheel. Alexis got nervous.

"...when you left rehab," Rick said, "...I kicked myself everyday for not going with you. I could've. But...but I thought that I was a lost cause and that I couldn't improve, and that I wasn't interested in improving, even though it meant being with you. I missed you SO much, Alex. Once you were gone, it was like there was this...this gaping maw in my heart, and nothing could fill it. Not even the vices that had once filled in for everything else with such ease. And then, seeing you at the grocery...once again I wanted to go home with you. Wanted to make it work. And, again, I didn't. I've regretted that too."

Alex smiled warmly, exhaling smoke and reaching over, patting his arm.

"Wherever you go, I will go, and I don't mean that in the creepy stalker kinda way, I mean, unless you're into that, you fuckin' weirdo," Rick said, the both of them laughing as their eyes locked; Rick sighed and added, "all I know is that I looked for something to make me happy my entire life. But nothing, not even the things that seemed to work the best, has ever worked as well as you have. It's high fucking time I admit to myself that I am madly in love with you, and yeah, I'm ride or die, so where we goin'?"

Alexis, on the verge of tears, tossed her cigarette out the window, grabbed his face and kissed him before answering, "The La Portia Docks."

When John got home that evening, he was confused by this skinny little disheveled young lady sitting on his bench. When he approached, he could see she was in obvious need of help, and that was before she handed him the note. John took it, opened the door to the trailer and let Ellen inside, following behind her as he read what Alexis had left for him.

"Dear John, okay that's a stupid way to start a letter, I mean what am I, a cliche? I kinda am actually. Anyway, this is my sister Ellen, my younger sister. Rick and I just rescued her from our parents, and I couldn't think of anywhere else she could be, SHOULD be, than with you. You did wonders for me, and now I need you to do the same for her. She needs help, John, she needs someone to guide her and watch over her. There's nobody I trust in this world more than you to do that. You've proven yourself beyond capable time and time again. I won't be back for a good while. Tell Geena we're sorry about taking her boat. She'll get it back though, don't worry. Anyway, we really need to go. Thank you for everything, and I hope you can do for her what you did for me until I can come home to you both. I love you, dad. I'll come back soon."

John sat down in his easy chair and felt his tears running down his face. Ellen had reappeared, and was standing next to him. He looked up at her, stood up and opened his arms. Ellen, somewhat hesitant but not one to doubt her sisters good taste and judgment, hugged him, and he squeezed her with more love than she'd ever gotten from their actual father.

"It's okay if you're mad at her, I don't think anyone would blame you," Ellen said and John laughed.

"Mad?" he asked, "I'm not mad. I've never been fuckin' prouder."

"My parents gave me cocoa after my brother died," Lux said.

She was sitting at the table in the kitchen, the glass, piping hot and full of marshmallows, in front of her. Lilian, Miranda and Maddie were all sitting around her, just watching, waiting for her to talk when she was comfortable. Lux sighed and reached out for the glass, turning it around a little, looking at the imagery that was on it. She then pulled her hand back and set it down in her lap with the other one once more.

"I guess they thought, I don't know," she continued, shrugging, "that somehow cocoa would fix it, but really, everything was already fixed. He was dead."

Lilian exhaled silently, unsure of how exactly she had become the bastion for safe harbor for young, terrified girls. First Maddie, now Lux. She didn't mind. Nobody had helped her when she'd been a child, so now, if anything, she reveled in the fact that she could manage to protect kids this way, but it was still hard to get used to. Lux picked up the cocoa and took a nice, long sip, letting it warm her insides. She then set the mug back down on the table.

"I don't wanna say anything to them, about what he did, because they'll just say 'oh, he was a boy, boys are curious' and I don't want to ruin their memory of him, but I also don't feel like it's fair for me to be trapped with it alone," Lux continued, "I'm sorry for coming here."

"Don't be sorry, this is a safe environment," Miranda said, reaching out and rubbing her back, "nobody here is going to judge you, and we all believe you."

Lilian got up and walked away from the table, Maddie hot on her heels. As Lilian entered the hall bathroom, Maddie did so right after her, shutting the door behind them.

"What do we do?" Maddie asked.

"I really don't know," Lilian said, "her parents aren't abusing her, if anything her home life is now safer than it was, so it isn't like it was with you, where she needs a place to go. I think just listening to her, being her friend, is enough for the moment."

"What if it isn't enough?" Maddie asked, causing Lilian to stop what she was doing and look at her; Maddie continued, fidgeting with the tassels on her sweatshirt and looking at the ground, "what if...what if she needs more than that? Than what we can give her? You keep saying you're gonna fight for girls who are abused because you almost were, so we should be the perfect people for her to be with, right?"

Lilian smirked. This was what she'd liked having Maddie around for. To remind her of why she was doing what she was doing. Lilian sat on the side of the tub, Maddie sitting beside her, but neither saying a word for a few moments. Finally, when enough silence had filled the air, Lilian sighed and shook her head.

"You're smart," she said, "much smarter than I was at your age, that's for damn sure. I'm proud of you."

Maddie couldn't help but blush, as Lilian pulled her in and planted a kiss on the top of her head.

"Let's make her feel at home then, since she probably never has," Lilian said, Maddie nodding eagerly in agreement.

                                                                           ***

"Explain it to me," John said.

He and Helena had agreed to go out for coffee and donuts, a very 'adult' thing to do, but he was more than happy to do so. He wanted to know more about her, specifically about her kid. Helena, however, didn't seem all that interested in diving deeper into the subject.

"Explain yours first," she replied, biting into a sprinkled donut.

"My wife...ex wife, I guess...are they an ex if you're widowed?"

"That is an excellent question," Helena said, chuckling.

"Well, whatever terminology works, she and I were very much the same. Addicts. Drink. Drugs. Whatever. It's why I've felt so protective over Alexis, cause I saw myself, my wife, in her. I knew where that was headed, and it nearly ended the same way, albeit not intentionally, unlike my wife. See, I got sober. Once we discovered we were having a baby, I knew I couldn't keep going on the way I had been, and it was time to grow the fuck up. This kid deserved better. Not that we were, like, dangerous or gross, but just...it isn't fair to a child to bring it into that kind of environment, regardless of your pure hearted intentions. So I got sober. But my wife...she just...she couldn't handle it. She needed to self medicate."

"A lot of them do, no judgment," Helena said, picking up her coffee and sipping it.

"Exactly, I understood, I didn't hold it against her at all," John replied, "I just focused on my own sobriety, and our daughter. But she couldn't cope. So one night she piled herself and our kid in the car, wrote a note, took a whole lotta everything and drove the car straight into a wall at the highest speed she could."

"jesus, John," Helena whispered, sounding genuinely shocked, putting a hand to her mouth.

"Somehow my daughter survived, and I'm so happy she's here," John said, "she's my whole world. Everything that I do I do for her. That's why I want her to come work with me, with us, because...because it would make her so happy. Everyone here is understanding, there's no danger in our job. I understand it might get some strange looks, but if we put her specifically for jobs for developmentally disabled kids, like herself, then it should be fine. If anything, it would be relieving to the child, to their parents, to see an 'adult' with these issues being self sufficient, totally capable of being okay in the world after adolescence."

Helena smiled. She admitted John's fortitude, she had to admit. His refusal to back down for what he wanted for his kid. She lifted her coffee back to her lips and sipped again, then finished her donut and wiped her hands on the napkin on the table she'd been using.

"I'm so sorry," she said, "that that happened to you, to her, to your wife. That's absolutely awful. And you're right. What we do isn't dangerous, and we could find a place for her, yes. None of what you said can realistically be argued with. I only wish I had the chance to do the same as you for Adam."

"Why can't you?" John asked, picking a donut hole from a box and popping it in his mouth, chewing. Helena sighed.

There was an answer. She just didn't like to say it.

                                                                              ***

Alexis had been asleep when she'd gotten the call.

It woke her up from a deep snooze, scaring her. She reached down off the couch and fondled the floor nearby for her phone, and eventually answered only to hear her sister, Ellen, in a hushed voice, asking for help. Alexis sat up and pushed her messy hair from her face, now fully awake instantly.

"What's going on?" she had asked, and Ellen hung up. That was all Alexis needed. She called Geena, but no answer. She swore under her breath, then dialed John, but, again, got no answer. Alexis was starting to get frustrated. Where was everyone that mattered when she needed them? She tried Lilian. No answer. Now getting outright pissed, Alexis climbed off the couch and pulled some pants on, then knew exactly who she could go to.

Rick had been stocking various cheese in a display case that day for work. Not that he'd ever admit it, but he found this kind of menial task work soothing, in an almost hypnotic, zen like way. He liked organizing. He liked standing back, when it was all said and done, and admiring his handiwork. Rick backed away from the display, hands proudly on his hips, and he smiled. Suddenly he felt the presence of someone nearby and looked to see Alexis standing there next to him.

"...this is what you find joy in now?" Alexis asked, and Rick nodded, grinning.

"God I wanna get fucked up," he replied, making her laugh before he asked, "what are you doing here anyway? Are you gonna start outright stalking me, cause that could be kinda hot."

"I need your help," Alexis said. Rick gathered the now empty boxes and began carrying them to the back room, Alexis hot on his heels; she continued, "nobody else is answering me, and...and to be honest, I'm not sure I'd trust anyone else considering it has to do with a sibling, and you have an amazing sister."

As they reached the backroom, Rick dropped the boxes into a nearby pile then turned to face her.

"You met my sister?" he asked.

"I went and looked her up, yes," Alexis remarked, "yes, and she's...she's awesome, dude. But that's why I feel safest coming to you. My sister needs help, and I...I need you, Rick. I can't go back to our house alone."

"Sure you can," Rick said, "you can do anything you want."

"Okay, how about I don't WANT to, then?" Alexis said, "is that enough of an admission for you. Our parents made our youth a living hell. Why do you think I ended up an addict to begin with? I'm only okay now because my sister Geena and my friend John refused to let me go any further down that path. Now Ellen needs help, and I can be the one to give that to her."

"Then why the fuck you coming to me for?" Rick asked, stopping working and staring at her, adding, "after all, you and I made different choices. Look where you are now, compared to where I am. You got sober. You're working that job you love. I'm stocking cheese. Now I'm not saying I don't like stocking cheese, because I do, but what good could I really be for you? To bring an addict to help save someone from other addicts? That sounds ridiculous, right?"

Alexis couldn't even argue. He was right. She sat down on a nearby crate and buried her face in her hands, speaking muffled.

"Yes, realistically speaking it's a bad idea, and you're right, I don't need you to come with me," Alexis said.

"Exactly, you're a strong, independent woman," Rick said, leaning back against the shelving, folding his arms.

"I will kill you in this room and nobody will find you," Alexis replied, "so maybe I don't need you to come with me, but how about I want you to? Is that a valid enough fucking reason for your logic?"

"Alright, well, if you're gonna be so pathetic as to beg, then I suppose I have no choice but to give into your desires," Rick said. He sat down on the crate beside her and, taking her chin between his fingers, turned her face to meet his, making her blush as he added, "I joke, but I'm glad you came to me. I'm glad you trust me enough. And you know I would do anything for you."

Alexis nodded slowly as he pressed his lips against hers, and she happily kissed him back. Once they parted, he grinned, patting her thigh.

"Let's go save your sister," he said.

                                                                         ***

Lilian and Maddie had gone out to get take out for everyone, leaving Lux and Miranda alone. Lux was still sitting at the table, looking at her now empty cocoa mug, while Miranda did some dishes in the kitchen behind her. Neither one had said a word since the others had left, but Lux appreciated the small comfort of Miranda's presence, especially in doing something so normal and mundane in proximity to her. After a bit, she heard the water shut off, Miranda sigh, and then she saw Miranda pull out a chair at the table and sit beside her.

"I know it isn't the same, but," Miranda started, "for what it's worth, I know what it's like not to be heard. Listened to. Understood or told your feelings are lesser than mens. Back before I transitioned, if I had an opinion, people may not have respected it, but they at least heard it and acknowledged it with sincerity, because I was a man. But now? Now I'm lucky if anyone takes me seriously. Women are just...we're a second class citizen. That's all there is to it. And moreso if we're women that don't follow the norm. Women who were abused, traumatized, or maybe, in my case, didn't grow up as women."

Lux looked at Miranda and listened, taking it all in.

"For what it's worth, I won't tell you that your feelings are valid. You know they are. You don't need someone else to confirm that. What good does a strangers confirmation give you on something you already know for certain yourself? And I won't tell you that you're stronger as a result of it either, because all that does is insinuate that you have to undergo intense trauma in order to be worthy of respect and strength, which is also bullshit. But what I will say is this...nobody can ever tell you who you are otherwise, and that's worth a lot. Trust me on this."

Lux stared at Miranda and nodded slowly, understanding.

"So even if your folks don't love you as much as you wanted, other people do, and I know it can hurt to not have the love of your family, believe me I know first hand, there's other people who are your family, even if they aren't blood related, and guess what, those people love you because of who you are, not because you're who they expected you to be. If people don't love you because you failed to meet some bullshit expectation set before your birth, then how real was their love to begin with, like Maddie's mom," Miranda said, and Lux, without warning, lunged forward, hugging her and crying. Miranda rubbed her back gently, soothing the poor, distraught young girl.

Miranda knew what it was like to be a terrified little girl, contantly let down by the adults around her, and, like Lilian, she refused to play that same role.

                                                                          ***

"Loss, whatever kind, isn't something you're ever really prepared for, or equipped to handle, no matter how much you might think you are," Helena said, "all the psyching up and preparation in the world won't mean shit when the chips are down, and loss is at your front door."

Alexis and Rick could hear the shouting, the screaming, the glass smashing from inside the house as they exited the car in the driveway. They walked briskly up to the house and Alexis tried to open the door, but it wouldn't budge, clearly locked. Rick pushed her out of the way slightly, backed up and, using all his force, kicked the door in. Alexis had to admit...she would've jumped him right then and there had they not been in public. Together they headed inside and found themselves in the small foyer, unsure exactly where Ellen was.

"Everything comes at you so fast, and, in the moment, you make rash decisions that could either help or hurt you or soomeone else down the line, regardless of whether your intention is good hearted or not," Helena continued, "because even trying to do the right thing can result in the wrong thing happening, and things getting worse for everyone."

That's when they saw Ellen come tumbling down the stairs, their parents fighting at the top of it. Rick grabbed Ellen off the ground, as Alexis looked around and noticed a baseball bat in the umbrella can by the door. Rick noticed a small bag of something clutched in Ellens hand and instantly recognized it as cocaine, then looked up as her father arrived at the bottom step and kicked him in the face, sending him onto his back. And then, without any warning otherwise, Rick, as he was laying there staring at the ceiling, nursing his jaw, heard screaming. He craned his neck up and witnessed Alexis beating her father in the face with the bar while her mother screamed at the top of the stairs. Rick, eyes wide, eventually pulled himself back up off the floor, grabbed Alexis, and pulled her away. Ellen scrambled up and raced out the front door, as Rick held Alexis's face in his hands and looked in her eyes.

"We do things for those that we love without thinking of the ramifications of our actions, because, well, if we believe we're doing them for the right reasons, why would we assume those ramifications be negative?" Helena asked, "but even our goodhearted actions can have unintended negative consequences. Consequences that can, in the end, ruin our lives."

Alexis pushed forward and kissed Rick, and he kissed her back. After the kiss, lips barely apart as she breathed into his mouth, they both glanced towards her father, unmoving on the floor, and she whispered, "...what do we do?"

"...run," Rick said, "we run."

And so they did. They were out the door, in the car with Ellen and down the street in seconds flat. John ate another donut hole and wiped his hands on his pants as Helena finished her coffee and put her now empty cup on the table between them.

"So what happened?" John asked, "why can't you bring Adam into work the way I want to bring Star? You say you visit him all the time, just bring it up, see what he says."

"He won't say anything John," Helena said, "because he's dead."

That, John had to admit, he did't know how to respond to.