"Okay, you almost got it," Rachel said, laughing as she watched Ella climb up a tree to retrieve a kite. Ella grumbled as she finally reached the kite and started to pull it down, sliding down the tree with Rachel catching her around the waist, the both of them falling onto their backs and laughing hard. Rachel got up and pulled Ella up, still holding onto the kite.

"That wasn't so hard!" Rachel said.

"Yeah, says the one who didn't have to get it!" Ella said, laughing, "I'm not one to climb trees, I'm not used to it! It's hard! I'm not very strong, you know?"

"Ah, it's not that tough," Rachel said, as Gilly came racing up to them and tugging at Ella's arm.

"What is it?" Ella asked, still laughing as she turned towards Gilly.

"You have to come see this!" Gilly said in a hushed voice, "You need to come see this, you won't believe it!"

Ella and Rachel shrugged and followed Gilly as they headed back past the rest of the camp and into the woods. After about 15 minutes, Ella stopped to catch her breath as Rachel unscrewed the canteen she kept strapped across her chest and drank from it before handing it to Ella. After Ella drank some water, she wiped her mouth and looked at Gilly.

"Where are you taking us?" she asked.

"There's a boys camp," Gilly said, grinning, "There's a boys camp, like, right across from us!"

The unbridled enthusiasm in her voice confused and surprised Ella, who up to this point had been under the impression that Gilly solely liked girls, but she'd never really made that super clear, so. Ella glanced at Rachel, who just shrugged and screwed the cap back on her canteen when they heard someone coming up on the trail behind them, and they all turned to see Aime there.

"Where are you guys going? I saw you leaving," she said.

"We're going to see the boys camp, apparently," Rachel said.

"There's a boys camp?" Aime asked, smiling, sounding rather happy about it herself, "How did you find out about that?"

"I was catching frogs and I heard some guys shouting, and so I followed the voices until I found their camp," Gilly said, "They're not even that far from here! They've been there the whole time! I guess the counselors don't tell us cause they don't want girls and boys mixing, so."

"Alright, well let's get going," Aime said, walking next to Gilly, leaving Ella and Rachel to bring up the rear. As they walked behind them, Rachel slipped her hand in Ella's, making her blush. Rachel smiled and then quickly leaned in and kissed her cheek.

"Stooop," Ella said quietly, "God, they might see."

"So?" Rachel asked, "Are you...ashamed of me?"

Rachel and Ella started laughing again as they followed Aime and Gilly deeper into the woods.

                                                                                           ***

"You cannot keep doing this!" Gillys mother shouted, pacing back and forth in front of the couch, "This has got to stop! Not only are you painting a target on yourself, but I don't have the time to continually be called into the school to come get you!"

"Ramona," her father, sitting in the armchair next to the couch, said as he leaned forward, hands cupped, "Why are you doing this? What started this?"

"I...I don't know," Gilly said, stammering and looking at her shoes, "I don't know why. I'm sorry."

"The more you draw attention to it, the more you're going to get made fun of," her mother said, "Like BOYS, that is what you should be doing. That won't get you made fun of because that's what's expected of you."

"But I...I don't want to, I don't like them," Gilly said, "What's so wrong with-"

"It's not that there's anything wrong with it," her father said, "It's that in a public space like a school, especially at your age, it's going to draw ire, do you understand? If you want to just survive school, you're going to have to fit in."

"There's a dance coming up, right? Winter formal?" her mother asked, "You'll be going, and you're going to ask a boy."

"No!" Gilly shouted, near tears, before getting up and running upstairs to her bedroom. Once inside her bedroom, she flopped on her back and looked up at the ceiling, where her glowing stars were put. All she could think of was her History teacher at her private school, and how pretty she was...her dark, curly hair and her pale skin and her big, brown eyes. Gilly shut her eyes and tried to focus on this image in her head when her father came into the room and sat down on the bed with her.

"Ramona," he said, sounding exhausted as he removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes, "I love you. Things were so much easier when you were a kid. I could just fix everything by kissing you or putting a band aide on something or getting you ice cream or your favorite stuffed animal, but now...now everything is so hard."

"I'm not hard," Gilly said quietly, "You just don't understand me."

Her father smiled and stroked her hair, leaned in and kissed the side of her head.

"I may not but it doesn't mean I don't love you any less," he said, making her smile a little.

                                                                                            ***

The girls hid behind a group of bushes as Gilly parted them cautiously and they all peered through, seeing in fact that there was indeed a second camp here, a camp for boys. Gilly turned to Aime, who was grinning ear to ear as she looked from boy to boy, and for a moment, Ella noticed a sad look flash across Gilly's face, as if she felt jealous that Aime felt this way towards boys. But, as quickly as she spotted it, the look vanished, and Gilly turned back to looking at the boys.

"Boys are so boring," Rachel groaned as she sat a rock nearby, running her hands through her hair and pulling it back into a ponytail, "Seriously, there's nothing there to look at. They're so...paper doll."

"I'm sorry we all have different tastes," Aime said annoyed, "God forbid we aren't all as cool as you."

"Well, that's uncalled for," Rachel said, annoyed.

"So is putting down something you don't happen to like," Aime said, "I like boys, I'm sorry for that."

"Nobody is saying you have to apologize, jeez," Rachel said, half laughing, "Forget it."

"Should we go talk to them?" Gilly asked.

"Are we going to get in trouble if we do?" Aime asked, "They obviously didn't tell us the boys camp was this close for a reason, so it's possible they might punish us if we speak to them."

"What're they gonna do, send us home?" Rachel asked, making Ella laugh and Gilly smirk, "I mean, we're at camp, how much worse a punishment can they come up with?"

Ella sat down on a tree stump and looked at the kite as Rachel sat in her lap. Gilly and Aime continued to look through the bushes, and much as Gilly wanted to make everyone proud of her, she struggled to find the bravery of going through with talking to any of the guys she saw. Still...she knew if she was ever going to get her mothers approval, she had to do this...

                                                                                         ***

All the students were filing out of the classroom while Gilly sat at her desk, her bag packed on top of it, playing with her hands in her lap. After all the students left, her History teacher, Miss Norris, came down the isle and stopped at her desk. Norris sat down at a desk beside her and smiled at her.

"What's going on?" Norris asked, "You haven't been doing too well in class lately. Is everything okay?"

"...I'm sorry, I'll try harder."

"I'm not...Ramona, I'm not saying this to make you feel bad or guilt you into doing better, good lord," Norris said, chuckling, "No, I'm sincerely interested in how well you're doing. Talk to me. Are there students bothering you, or-"

"I don't want to go to the winter dance and my parents are making me ask a boy," Gilly said, near tears, wiping her eyes on her uniformed sleeve, "...have you...ever liked a girl, Miss Norris?"

"Back in college, yes," Norris said, crossing her legs and looking at Gilly seriously, "There was this girl in a blowoff class I took for fun, and we quickly became friends and spent a lot of time together. Once she realized how I felt, she became completely uninterested in even being my friend, and I was devastated. It wasn't the last time I've had feelings for another girl, but it was the last time i was honest about it, because I was too scared of losing people I cared about simply for being myself."

"...I don't want to not be me," Gilly mumbled and Norris smiled.

"You won't have to," she said, "Ramona, you're an extremely smart, empathetic, wonderful girl and with all the skills and talents you possess, nothing will stop you from being the best you, the you that you want to be."

Gilly smiled and stood up, picked up her bag and hugged Miss Norris before leaving the classroom. Sometimes the adults who care the most about us, Gilly discovered that day, were the ones we weren't even related to, sadly.

                                                                                              ***

"I like him," Aime said, pointing at a guy with curly brown hair, "But...there's no point in going out there to talk to him. He won't like me. Everyone always makes fun of my brace..."

"That's a stupid reason," Rachel said, "You never know, he may think it's cool."

"So then he only likes me for it?" Aime asked.

"My god you're impossible," Rachel muttered under her breath, "Listen, all I'm saying is if you do nothing, you gain nothing, but if you do something, sure you have a fifty fifty chance of things not working out, but you also have that same fifty fifty chance of something working out, and that's better than doing nothing at all, right?"

Suddenly a soccer ball came flying through the bushes and hit Gilly right in the head, knocking her onto her back. As Aime scrambled to help her up, a boy with short black hair and dark grey eyes poked his head through the bushes and smiled.

"Sorry," he said, "Are you okay? I didn't even know there was anyone back here."

"It's ok, it's not like we let you know," Aime said, as Gilly sat upright and rubbed the side of her head.

"You're not in pain are you?" the boy asked, and Gilly shook her head, slowly smiling.

"No. No I'm fine."

"Cool. Where did you guys come from?"

"The girls camp, about 25 minutes walking distance through the woods," Rachel said, "We didn't know there was a boys camp. Probably a reason for that. Not wanting boys and girls to get together in the woods...alone."

"Can I have my ball?" the boy asked as Gilly tossed it to him, and he smiled, "Sorry about hitting you. You know, me and some of my friends get together near the well about 10 minutes from here sometimes if you guys wanna come hang out."

"That sounds cool," Aime said, blushing, "We'll see you there sometime."

As the boy exited, Gilly couldn't figure out if she had butterflies in her stomach, or hornets.

                                                                                         ***

Standing in the main hall of the school during the winter formal, in her sparkly light blue dress her mother had had custom made for her, Ramona Gilly felt so out of place. She'd asked Brian Turner, and while he'd agreed reluctantly to go with her, he was now leaving her alone while he went off with some other guys and girls at another part of the room. Gilly wanted so badly to go home, knowing she didn't feel comfortable here, but she knew her mother would make a big scene out of it if she came home early, so her only choice was to stay.

"It's all so dumb isn't it?" Miss Norris asked, now standing beside her in her own dress, arms folded.

"What is?" Gilly asked, surprise her presence.

"Dances like this, trying to force awkward kids together, knowing full well none of them are really comfortable, and then telling them 99% of the time that being together is wrong," Norris said, Gilly now noticing that her hair pulled was back into a messy bun, "But it's a time honored tradition, or whatever, so we have it every year."

"I don't want to be here," Gilly said quietly.

"...you can dance with me," Norris said.

"Wouldn't that be weird? A student dancing with a teacher?"

"Who cares?" Norris asked, "Ramona, everything is weird and nothing makes sense. So you try and make sense of it on your own, in any way that you can. I'm here, I'm your friend, and I will dance with you if you want so you don't have to feel alone. To be honest, I'd rather be anywhere else but here also."

"I don't really know how to dance."

"Neither do I," Norris said, the two of them laughing as they headed onto the dance floor together. After the formal ended, Norris agreed to drive Gilly home, but not before stopping for donuts at an all night donut shop first. Sitting in a booth inside, both still in their ridiculous gowns, eating donuts right from the box, Gilly had never been happier.

"I just want you to know," Norris said, "That there is nothing wrong with you."

"I don't know why nobody else will say it."

"Because they're dumb, Ramona. You're a good kid. You'll go far and end up happy, it's just going to hurt a lot before you get there," Norris said, "I got made fun of so much growing up because I had headgear for the first few years in elementary school, but look at me now. Teacher at a prestigious private school? Who'd have thunk?"

"I like you," Gilly blurted out and Norris smiled, taking another donut from the box.

"I know you do," she said, "And that's okay. We all have crushes on teachers growing up. I'm happy to be the one thing telling you you're normal. Because trust me, I didn't have that growing up, and I'd have killed for it."

A few moments passed as they both continued to eat donuts.

"Thank you Miss Norris."

"You're welcome Ramona."

Ella opened her eyes to bright sunlight coming in through a window; as she blinked a few times, waiting for her eyesight to adjust, she looked around and saw she was in her bed in her bedroom, in her pajamas. She sighed and sat up, carefully running her hands through her hair until she realized it was soaking wet, and suddenly the room was starting to flood, the floor filling up with water, her bed beginning to float. She glanced across the room at Gordons fishbowl and saw it sliding off the table. Ella crawled quickly to the end of the bed and reached her arms out, but she couldn't reach it. Then she heard shouting, and she glanced around the bed, seeing Gilly, Rachel and Amie all sinking, drowning, in various spots. Ella started to panic, there was nothing she could do, but she had to act...her friends were going to die.

"Ella!" Gilly shouted, sounding legitimately terrified. Ella spun her head from Gilly to Rachel, who had crawled onto a floating dresser and seemed to be okay. Ella looked to Amie, who was also struggling to stay above water. Ella had to make a decision. She grabbed a jacket and, holding onto one sleeve, tossed it out over the water towards Gilly, who grabbed the other sleeve, and Ella reeled her in. As Gilly got onto the bed with her, she threw her arms around Ella, sobbing, and Ella stroked her soaking wet hair as she watched Amie slowly drown in front of her. Ella shut her eyes and started crying too. There was nothing she could've done. Not everyone can be saved.

And then she woke up. The wind was howling, and her right cheek was scraped and bleeding a bit from where she'd fallen face first into a tree stump at the bottom of the small hill. She groaned, trying to use her elbows to push herself up. Once she was finally sitting upright, she grabbed the tree and tried to stand, and then realized the tupperware with Gordon was nowhere to be found. She started to hyperventilate as she searched around on the ground for it, and finally found it, a few feet from her, and he was perfectly fine. Gordon, and his tupperware had fared much better than she had. She picked it up and kissed it, before looking around and trying to get her bearings.

"Help!" a voice cried out over the darkness, and Ella instantly knew it was Amie. She immediately took off in that direction without a second thought.

                                                                                             ***

"You're going because we need some time," Thomas said as he sat in the car by the bus stop, Amie in the passenger seat, brooding. She had her arms folded, softly swinging her legs, the brace squeaking a bit, making Thomas grimace.

"Just admit it, you don't like being around me around other people," Amie said under her breath, "I understand. I don't want to be around me either."

"Amie, it isn't that," Thomas said, sounding exhausted at having this conversation again, "Your mother and I just haven't been on vacation alone in a long time, and we really want to do this. Plus, you might make friends at this camp. It's all girls, and girls are much nicer than boys are, so they're less likely to-"

"Girls are not nicer than boys," Amie said, "You just think that because you've never had to deal with them. They can be just as vicious. Girls are the ones who mostly make fun of me in class, so yeah, I don't think I really want to be friends with anyone, anywhere, at any time."

"Amie, god...I...I just want you to have a good time."

"Then let me come with you guys!"

"No, this is just for us and-"

"Why can't I come?!"

"Because we don't want you there!" he finally shouted, slamming the steering wheel, honking the horn and scaring her. Amie looked away as he rubbed his forehead and reached out to touch her shoulder, but she grabbed her backpack and got out of the car. She swore she'd never speak to him again, and considering how things were going currently, that looked to very much come true.

Sitting against this tree as the area around her started to flood, Amie figured this was it. This was how it ended for her. She didn't want to die like this, alone, cold, terrified, but in a way, it was almost fitting for her life. She'd always be the loner, the scared little girl. As she wiped her eyes on her sleeve, she suddenly could hear Ellas voice, and her eyes widened. She waved her arms above her head and shouted.

"Ella!!" she yelled, "Ella, I'm over here!"

She saw Ella coming over a large rock, rising water starting to surround her. Ella shined her flashlight towards Amie, and Amie for one brief moment couldn't believe this. Someone...had come looking for her? Someone cared, and was worried, and had come to get her? This couldn't be happening. This wasn't supposed to happen to her. Nobody was supposed to like her.

"Amie! How do I get to you?" Ella shouted, and Amie just shrugged.

"I...I don't know!" she shouted back, "Be careful! The water is really powerful!"

Suddenly, they heard a cracking sound, and Ella looked at the large tree behind the rock she was standing on, and it was starting to come down. Amie screamed, as Ella fell backwards while the tree came slamming down on the rock. For a few seconds, Amie wondered if Ella was alive, until she came back up from the water and climbed onto the now fallen tree.

"Swim to me!" Ella shouted, and Amie pointed at her leg braces, making Ella smack her own forehead, forgetting her friends handicap. Amie looked around as they heard something else now, something louder, some sort of rumbling. The water that had come flowing down above her had finally fully crested the ridge and was now coming at her in full force. She had no choice, and she grabbed her pack and took off towards Ella. The water was deep, but not so deep she couldn't wade to the tree, as the water came and surrounded them more. Lightening crackled across the sky, as Ella helped her friend up on the tree trunk and hugged her tightly.

"Are you okay?" Ella asked.

"Are you okay?" Amie asked, touching the scrape on Ellas face, making Ella smile.

"I'm fine, I'm just glad you're alright. What're you doing out here?" Ella asked, and Amie looked embarrassed as she reached into her pack and pulled out a small canister and handed it to Ella, making her ask, quizzically, "What is this?"

"It's Scrambles," Amie said, finally sobbing, "It's Scrambles" she repeated.

"Scrambles?"

"When I first got my braces, my mom got me a support dog. He was this big fluffy German Shepard, and he was my best friend. He slept with me and made me feel better when I was sad. My stepdad left the gate open while doing yard work one afternoon and Scrambles got out and was hit by a car. I told him I'd let him go out here, because he liked being outside so much. I was going to dump him out here."

"...Amie," Ella said softly, "I...why didn't you just come to me? You know I have Gordon, you know I'd understand, so why-"

"Because I needed to do it by myself, and how was I supposed to know this would happen?" Amie replied, "...if you can just get me somewhere where I can dump him safely, I'd be so thankful. Please help me Ella, nobody else ever does."

Ella nodded, knowing how that felt, and decided then and there she had to help Amie finish this mission, as dangerous as it had become.

                                                                                            ***

Back in the cave, Rachel standing at the opening to the cave and looking out and Gilly sitting on a rock in front of a fire Rachel had started, the girls felt worried that their friends may never come back. Rachel was swinging a stick, thinking to herself about Ella, and what a good person she was. How she was going out to search for her friend, no matter the weather conditions. Behind her, Gilly sniffled and wiped her nose on her arm. Rachel turned and the two locked eyes.

"She'll come back," Rachel said softly, "Don't be scared."

"I know she'll come back," Gilly said, "I just hate myself. I didn't stop Amie from leaving this morning, and I caused all of this."

"You didn't cause anything, Gil," Rachel said, "These things aren't your fault."

"Everything is my fault!" Gilly screamed, "Everything is my fault! Ask anyone around here! Everyone thinks I'm weird and is scared of me, and nobody wants to be my friend, and everything that goes wrong is because of me! Just like Jessica! This is just like Jessica!"

Rachels brow raised, curious now, "Jessica?"

"...last year, there was this girl named Jessica, and she was an intern who was working with my cabin leader," Gilly said, trying not to cry, "She actually wanted to be my friend, and I was so happy. She actually took an interest in me, and always took the time to talk to me, and...and she suggested we go on a hike, so I thought it'd be fine. It was fine, at first, and then...I don't know...an hour or so into the hike, we got to this clearing, and it had this tent and a campsite, and we didn't know where it had come from. We started to look inside it, and it had a sleep bag and stuff, so it looked like it was being used."

"...that's...creepy," Rachel said, Gilly nodding in agreement, her tears rolling down her cheeks.

"And then she zipped the tent up while we were in it, and she told me it was her camp site, so she'd lied about not knowing where it'd come from, and she told me this was where she came to get away from people and stuff, and I understood because I guess growing up she also was made fun of a lot and that's why she liked me because she saw a lot of herself in who I was. She told me...."

Gillys voice cracked, as if struggling to speak, so Rachel sat beside her and rubbed her back.

"She told me that what the world needs is to love one another so that nobody ever feels left out again, and that we should start that right now, and she..."

Gilly looked at Rachel, who finally understood where this story was going. Rachel put a hand to her mouth in shock, shaking her head as Gilly broke down and sobbed.

"Oh god, oh, Gilly, I am so...god...did she get fired, or?"

"I never told anyone," Gilly said, "She said she'd done this to other girls too, that she was helping us, but it didn't feel like help..."

"Gilly, you...you need to tell-"

"Why bother, she isn't here anymore," Gilly said, "Nobody would listen anyway. Nobody listens to me, and everyone would say I deserved it anyway, or was lying, so who cares. I did deserve it."

"You did not deserve that!" Rachel said, "Nobody deserves that! Gilly, I am so so sorry that happened to you."

Gilly didn't talk, she just started sobbing harder, laying on her side on the floor of this cave, while Rachel sat beside her. Now Rachel understood why Gilly felt so bad...because these really were the first true friends she had, and she felt like she'd lost them now. She felt like she deserved to lose her friends. Rachel was finally starting to understand this broken group of girls she'd aligned herself with.

                                                                                             ***

Amie and Ella had fought their way up to the top of a hill, despite all reasoning not to, and were now standing looking out over the forest below. Ella handed Amie back the canister and she took it carefully, unscrewed the lid and exhaled slowly.

"Scrambles, I wish you could've met Ella, because she's a good friend, and she would've liked you a lot. As much as I loved you, I'm glad knowing you weren't in pain, and I have people who care about me now, so while you did a really good job, you can rest knowing I won't be alone. I love you Scrambles."

And with that, she tossed it into the air over the cliff, and Amie suddenly hugged Ella, taking her by surprise, but Ella wasn't too bothered by it. She just smiled and hugged her friend.

"You're right," Ella said, "You have friends. You really do."

"I know."

"Come on, we have to get Gilly and Rachel," Ella said, "And then I want to sleep for a few days straight."

The girls laughed as they headed off back through the woods, the storm dying down, as they went back to find the cave with their friends. For the first time in her life, Amie didn't feel alone. When they finally reached the cave, Rachel was happy but Gilly was ecstatic, and hugs went all around. After Amie told them why she'd come out in the first place, Rachel and Gilly gave their condolences and understood, and wanted to go back to camp and sleep a few days off as well. This whole experience had been downright exhausting. As the girls packed up and headed off, Rachel stopped Ella, grabbing her arm.

"What's up?" Ella asked.

"I just want you to know that you're a really good friend, and a great person," Rachel said, "I hope you know that. These girls really need you."

Ella blushed, "Come on, I can't be that-"

"I really like you, Ella."

Rachel put her hands on Ellas shoulders and kissed her, Ella happily kissing her back. Outside, Amie asked Gilly where the other two were, and as Gilly glanced back into the cave, she felt a terrible pain in the pit of her stomach. Gilly didn't say a thing the rest of the walk home.

                                                                                            ***

The following morning, in the cafeteria, the girls were seated at the breakfast table eating.

"Why would you want shark teeth?" Rachel asked.

"Because I could chew through anything!" Gilly said, "I'd be unstoppable! Plus maybe they'd make a cartoon after me. Shark Girl!"

"That would be pretty cool, she's right," Ella said, as Amie came and stood by the table, Ella looked up and smiled, "Good morning. Sitting with us?"

"If that's okay."

"It's always okay," Rachel said, as Amie took a seat with them. With her friends.

With her first best friends.

Ella came into the bathroom where Gilly was already standing at the sink, brushing her teeth. Ella started to brush her hair out while Gilly spat into the sink, then pulled her lips back and looked at her teeth, her brow furrowing.

"I wish I had more teeth," she said, "I wish I was like a shark."

"There's nothing really stopping you, you go out there and be the best shark you can be," Ella replied, the two of them laughing, "I told Amie to meet me outside this morning, but I haven't seen her yet..."

"She's gone," Gilly said, this blunt statement making Ella stop brushing her hair and look at her.

"What do you mean she's gone?"

"She took off, I passed her this morning. She was outside, already dressed, and she was heading into the woods," Gilly said, "Said she had something to do."

"Gilly!" Ella replied, "You just let her go?"

"Why not, she would've just let me go," Gilly said solemnly, making Ella scoff and rush back into the main room. She pulled her suitcase out, quickly got dressed and then pulled a small, tall rectangular tupperware out, opened Gordons trunk and poured him and some water into it, then shut it. Gilly came in, noticing the tupperware with the holes in the lid, and looked at Ella.

"What're you doing?" Gilly asked.

"I'm going to find her!" Ella said, "She might be going to do something to herself, Gilly! Just because you don't like her doesn't mean she should leave."

"I do like her," Gilly said, "She's the one who doesn't like me."

"Well, I'm going after her," Ella said, "See ya."

And with that, Ella was out the door in a flash. A few moments passed as Gilly contemplated all of this, stomped her foot and started out the door after her.

                                                                                              ***

Amie had left early that morning, pack and all, and had passed by Gilly on her way out. Gilly was coming back from the kitchen early, having gained a friend in there who would give her desserts in the mornings for breakfast. The two saw one another, made direct eye contact, but neither one stopped to talk. Walking alone in the woods now, enjoying the peace and quiet, the beauty in nature surrounding her, Amie actually didn't feel all that bad for once. She stopped, pulled her pack back up a little and grunted.

"God you're heavy," she mumbled, continuing to walk.

This shouldn't take that long. She'd planned this as soon as she was told she'd be going to camp. She just would be gone for the afternoon, and back by the evening, and nothing would go wrong, and nobody would notice. It was a free day, it wasn't like there were any activities planned, so nobody would probably even notice she was gone. Yes, everything would be fine.

                                                                                              ***

"I just don't think it's that big a deal," Gilly said, marching alongside Ella.

"It's a big deal because the entire time Amie has been here, she's felt incredibly alone and out of place, and I've been trying to make her not feel like that because that's how I always feel, so I know how bad it is. Has she been rude to you? Yeah, and sure her home life sucks and that's no reason to be mean to other people who have nothing to do with it, but still, we need to be nice to her. We have to have eachothers backs, because nobody else has them," Ella said.

"...I'm sorry," Gilly mumbled, "I guess I screwed up."

"Ahoy!" a voice called out, as Rachel, wearing an eyepatch and swinging a stick at them, jumped onto a large rock ahead, "Avast ye mateys, where ye scallywags be off to?"

"We be searchin for someone dat abandoned ship, cap'n!" Gilly said, not missing a beat in the sudden roleplay and making Ella laugh in the process.

"Arrr, I see...well then my bonnie lasses, let us sail onward and bring this traitor back to pay for their crimes against the sea!" Rachel exclaimed as she hopped off the rock and lifted her eyepatch, "Seriously though, what's going on?"

"Amie ran off," Ella said, "So we're going to find her."

"She ran away?" Rachel asked, pulling her hair back into a ponytail, "Alright, well, let's see if we can find her."

"How? We can't track people by scent, we're not dogs," Gilly said, "One day we will be, but not today."

"We may not be able to sniff her out, but we can shout for her," Rachel said, cupping her hands around her mouth and shouting loudly, "AMIE!"

No response came.

"Hmmm," Rachel said.

"I don't think she's close enough," Ella said.

"If a girl shouts in the woods and nobody's around to hear it, did she make a sound?" Gilly asked, making Ella laugh and Rachel smirk.

"Well then, saddle up and let's move out, we gotta find her," Rachel said.

                                                                                           ***

Aime was lost deep in thought as she continued to hike towards her destination when suddenly she felt soft raindrops hitting her face. She wiped them away and the noticed fatter raindrops splashing against her glasses, and she groaned. This wasn't supposed to happen! It was supposed to be nice today! It was summer for god sakes! Aime pulled her pack up on her shoulder and continued uphill. A little rain wasn't going to stop her, she was determined to finish what she'd started months ago.

She could remember laying in bed, making this promise to herself that she'd do this as soon as she could when she got to camp, that it was only fair. Nobody else was ever going to do something for her, so she had to take care of everything on her own, and she knew what was best anyway. The rain started getting harder and harder, and the wind picked up as Aime ducked under a bent over tree, trying to stay relatively dry and safe. She was starting to entertain the idea that maybe she had made a mistake after all...

She narrowed her eyes and stared ahead at the darkened skies ahead of her...nothing was going to stop her, not when she was this close.

                                                                                           ***

"I'm not so sure this is the smartest thing to be doing..." Gilly shouted, as the girls headed into a small cave between some rocks to get out of the rain. Ella now felt particularly stupid...this had been her idea, to come out here and search for her friend, and now it seemed like she might have put them all in danger.

"Nobody knows where we are, but somebody is going to eventually notice we're missing," Rachel said as she sat down and squeezed her hair, the water pouring from it onto the dirt below, "So we stay here until the storm passes, it shouldn't be too long, and then we'll go back to camp and-"

Rachel and Gilly trailed off, as Ella stood at the cave front, looking out at the sky. Somewhere out there was a girl who had no friends, and thought the friends she did have here weren't her friends. Somewhere out there was this scared little girl, and Ella knew what that was like, to be scared. She couldn't let this happen. Ella pulled her pack on tighter, made sure the lid on Gordons container was airtight and then took off into the forest again. Rachel rushed to the cave front, peering out.

"Ella!" she shouted, "Ella come back!"

"...She just ran out there," Gilly said, eyes wide, appearing shocked. Rachel turned and looked at Gilly, then walked to her and put her hands on Gillys shoulders. Gilly was shaking, like she was about to have a meltdown of some kind, Gilly continued to mutter, "This is all my fault. I should've stopped Aime this morning. I did this. I did this."

"Gilly, shhh, calm down," Rachel said, hugging Gilly and stroking her hair, "You're okay."

Out in the wind and the rain, the sound of thunder overhead, and no way to see much in front of herself, Ella kept fighting to move forward. She had to find Amie. She had to show this girl that she was their friend. Nobody deserved to be alone, Ella knew what that was like, and she never wanted anyone else to feel that way. Suddenly she skidded, her heel sliding on a rock in the mud, and she slipped and tumbled down a hill, eventually hitting a tree and breaking her roll. She didn't get back up.

And Aime...Aime sat beneath the trees she'd stopped at, too scared to move forward, too scared to leave their comforting safety. The rain was turning everything around her to mud and water from an uphill stream rushed past her, creating tiny waterfalls on each side of the tree. This was all her fault. She really was a bad friend, a bad person, and she was going to die here.

She was going to die here.

Ella couldn't sleep.

She had rolled over time and time again, hearing Gilly snore softly under her bunk. Ella leaned over the bunk and looked at Gilly, who was asleep with a bag of chips on her chest, and her sleep mask covering her eyes.

"Pssst," Ella whispered, "Gilly? Are you up?"

No response except she mumbled and rolled over, then hugged the bag of chips like a teddy bear. Ella laughed to herself at this sight, and then noticed the tapping sound. She looked around, unsure of where it was coming from. She heard it again.

*tap! tap tap!*

Finally her eyes caught sight of a hand with salmon colored nails tapping at the cabin window. After a few seconds, Rachel's face peered in through the window, and when their eyes locked, Rachel smiled and waved, then made a "come here" gesture with her hand before disappearing again. Ella slowly crawled out of bed, and landed softly next to Gilly's bunk, waking her for a split second. As Gilly's eyes fluttered open, her breath barely a whisper, she asked Ella what was going on, and Ella told her she was going to pee and to go back to sleep. With that, Gilly rolled back over and went back to sleep, as Ella headed to the door. Once outside, she heard the bush beside her rustle, and saw Rachel coming out in black, high waisted shorts and a tank top.

"What're you doing?" Ella asked, "It's really late. If you get caught out here-"

"Come with me, I wanna do something," Rachel said, grinning.

"...what...do you want to-"

"Just come with me, it'll be cool, I promise!" Rachel said, taking Ella by the hand and pulling her away from the cabin. As Ella followed Rachel through the nearby woods and down a path, she could hear the sound of water flowing, and once they broke through the clearing, she could see it was coming from a small waterfall in a hidden lake. The trees overhead acted as a wonderful canopy, and they could hear crickets singing all around them.

"How did you find this?" Ella asked.

"I was with a few other girls from Turtle Cabin and one of the older ones showed it to me, she said a camp counselor showed it to her and her friends a few years back," Rachel said, "Isn't it beautiful? Come on."

Rachel approached the water and stepped into it, shaking a bit at first as it was clearly colder than she'd expected, before finally submerging her entire body in it. She looked back at Ella, standing by a tree stump, still in her pajamas. Rachel waved at her, trying to get her to come in, but Ella merely clung at her pajama top even tighter, unsure of what to do in this situation. After a few minutes of watching Rachel swim, Ella approached the water a bit more and stuck her right foot in.

"Come on!" Rachel said, "It's nice!"

"Is it really cold? It feels really cold," Ella said and Rachel shrugged.

"I mean, at first, but you get used to it," she replied. Ella waited a few more moments, and then took her pajamas off and, just in her underwear, walked slowly into the lake. It was freezing, but it was also refreshing, and she felt like she was feeling water for the first time. Ella put her hair up in a bun and looked around.

"Why did you bring me here?" Ella asked.

"Because you're like your fish, you wanna make friends, but you're stuck in a tiny little suitcase," Rachel said, "So I'm making it easier for you. Besides, anytime I try and talk to you in a group, those other two always make sure there's drama."

"Yeah, Amie's...I don't know," Ella said, "I mean, from what she's told me, she has every right to be angry, but I don't think she realizes she's not the only one who feels like that. Gilly feels just as bad about her home life. I think it's because they're too similar, they can't see how much they actually have in common."

"Probably," Rachel said, "But you're spending all your time at camp making sure they don't fight instead of having fun for yourself."

"I have plenty of fun!" Ella said, just as Rachel filled her mouth up with lake water and spit it at her, making her squeal and cover her face. With that, Ella started splashing at Rachel, the both of them laughing and playing. Ella thought back to all the times she'd gone to the beach. She used to enjoy it, she loved the sand and the water, all the birds, but these days...the last few times had been so awkward and she felt so uncomfortable in her skin, around all those people.

"Camp is the first time I've been in the water in a while," Ella said after the splash fight stopped, the two of them now just wading, treading water.

"Really? I try and go swimming at least once a week," Rachel said.

"I used to like going to the beach, but I don't know, as I've gotten older, I feel like people are judging me, you know? Like, they stare me up and down and I feel so weird, and unwelcome. It makes me hate how I look."

"Welcome to the wonderful world of puberty," Rachel said, "I know that when I got my period over a year ago, that's exactly what my mom told me. They are judging us, Ella, because society expects girls, even girls as young as us, to look a certain way. We're the latest model, Girl 2.0, with faster downloads from the internet."

Ella smirked, scratching her forehead, "I just mean...I wish it didn't make me feel so uncomfortable in my own body. I should be able to go swimming without-"

"Yeah, I know. But guess what, you can't. You can't go swimming, you can't wear any outfit, eat certain foods, without being judged, leered at, commented on. You're a walking art installation," Rachel said, "And it sucks."

"...I don't want to get older," Ella whispered.

"Well, hey, it's not all bad," Rachel said, swimming closer, "I mean, there's some good things about growing up that I've discovered. People take you more seriously, and treat you with a little more respect...at least my parents do. Also, I can't wait to go to college and have, like, a career doing what I love. That's pretty exciting."

"I guess..." Ella said, "I don't know. I don't like change, really, and growing up is nothing but change. Plus I..."

Rachel cocked her head to the side, seeming interested, so Ella went on.

"I don't know, I've been having these dreams. I talked with Gilly about it a few nights ago, but like..." Ella stopped, unable to find the courage to go on before she caught the moonlight breaking through the overhead canopy and slicing across Rachels face, lighting up her eyes. Ella continued, "I really...in my dream, I'm often like...seeing this girl, and she's really pretty, and she kisses me and then I wake up."

"I had those," Rachel said, taking Ella by surprise, "I only had it about three times, and mine were a bit different, it was this girl in my homeroom class, but it always ended like that. With us kissing. I invited her to dance with me last year at the end of the year dance, but she didn't really...I don't know, she just said no and sort of walked away."

Rachel glanced away and wiped her nose, before going on.

"But I mean, it's not like I was too heartbroken, I barely even knew her. Besides, there's lots of cute guys at my school too, so it's not like I didn't have someone to dance with," Rachel said, smiling again.

"Well, I'm glad you have a workaround," Ella said sternly.

"Hey hey, whoa, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you upset," Rachel said, "I'm just sharing!"

"I know, I'm sorry. I'm glad you were still able to have a nice time," Ella said, "But for me, I have never really thought any guy was cute. That's why I spend most of my time indoors these days, just hanging out with Gordon, because...it's like, all the girls I know wanna do now. We used to do things together and now they just wanna watch guys play sports or go to the mall and look for boys, and I..."

"You don't?"

"I...don't...like boys," Ella said, the words finally making sense to her brain as they left her lips, "Oh. I don't like boys."

Rachel swam closer, smiling at her.

"There's nothing wrong with that," Rachel said, "This isn't like when our grandparents were growing up. It's so much more accepted today, to like the same gender, and you're not alone cause you know I do too."

Ella looked at Rachel again, swam closer to her and, bobbing up and down gently in the water together, she reached out and put her hands on Rachel's shoulders. Ella could feel her heartbeat thudding, her breath shortening, and she leaned closer, shutting her eyes, pressing her lips against Rachel's lips. They kissed for what felt like minutes, but was likely only seconds, and when it ended, Ella couldn't bring herself to look at her again.

"What's wrong?" Rachel asked.

"I don't feel like I'm cool enough or something," Ella said, "I don't know."

"You're totally fine, Ella," Rachel said, giggling, "And you're not alone. We're all here together."

Ella blushed, and the two of them spent the remaining time sitting on the shore of the lake, talking about school, the first time Rachel accepted her feelings for girls and how Ella could accept herself better. After it finished and her hair was dryer, Ella put her pajamas back on, and Rachel took her back to her cabin. Before heading inside for the night, Rachel gave her a quick peck on the cheek, making her blush deeper, and then headed to her own cabin. Ella started to climb back up to her bunk, but stopped and looked at Gilly, realizing that something was different when she'd kissed Gilly than kissing Rachel tonight. Ella tapped Gilly on the shoulder, and one of her eyes slowly lifted open.

"What?" Gilly asked groggily, before burping.

"I'm glad you're here," Ella said, smiling, and Gilly smiled back.

"I'm glad I'm here too," Gilly replied, "Otherwise I don't know where I would be and that would be so scary, right? Not knowing where you are? How would you find yourself?"

Ella laughed and pushed Gilly on the shoulder, telling her to go back to sleep. With that, she got into her top bunk, settled in and went to sleep.

She didn't have the dream that night.

It was a major summer storm, brought on suddenly and without warning, causing everyone to gather all the kids into the main hall for the night, or at least until it seemed safe enough to send them back to their respective cabins. As the kids piled in and took seats on the floor wherever, Charlie and Ryan were sitting at a nearby table.

"This happened a lot in my summer camps, but, I went to summer camps in Kansas and you have a pretty good chance of the weather killing you there at any given time or the year," Ryan said, making Charlie giggle.

"The only times I ever had to be in the main hall at any camp I went to was when it was a mandatory thing or for eating," Charlie said, "I never wanted to spend time around adults."

"You still don't."

"Well, true, yes," Charlie said, "But at least they pay me to."

"Wait, you're getting paid?" Ryan asked, smirking, and making her laugh

A little bit in the back corner of the hall was Aimee, Ella and Gilly seated together in a small circle, not saying a word, just passing the time in the hall. Gilly was adjusting the lighting on the lantern that each group had been given, and she was trying to get it just so. Aimee sighed and pushed her curly bangs out of her eyes as she glanced around at everyone.

"I hate this, I wanna just sleep in my own bunk," Amiee said, as Ella shrugged.

"I mean, I'm not too happy about it either, but we don't have a choice until they tell us we can go back to the cabins," Ella said.

"This is the best kind of thing to happen at camp!" Gilly said excitedly, "Like, we can do so many things, like tell secrets or play 20 questions or have scary stories told!"

"It's late at night, I don't really feel like participating in slumber party games," Aimee said, making the giddiness on Gillys face slump a bit, until she looked at Ella and started smiling again.

"Ella, tell me something you've never told anyone else," Gilly said, and Ella twirled some hair around her finger, thinking.

"I guess, like, when I was in 3rd grade, I didn't like this girl because she made fun of how I dressed, and so one day during art, I walked by her chair and snipped some of her hair off. I never confessed, and now I feel really bad about it, but-"

"Hey, that's what she gets for being mean," Aimee interrupted, pulling her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them.

"Well, no, you shouldn't be mean back just because someone is mean to you," Ella replied, "Ya know, like, two wrongs don't make a right sorta thing? Anyway, I never told anyone about it but she was so upset. I think she thought it was me, but nobody saw me do it, so nobody could prove it was me."

"I actually think Amiee is right," Gilly said, making them both a bit surprised, "I mean, Ella is right too, just because someone is mean doesn't mean you should sink to their level, but hey, karma, right? She gave out bad energy and it came back at her worse."

Just then, they heard someone plop down beside them, and Ella noticed it was Rachel. She was in a nice, sleek, black robe, her hair back in a ponytail, chewing on some licorice.

"What're we talking about?" she asked.

"Being mean, and whether it's justifiable," Amiee said.

"Hmmm," Rachel said, "It really depends, honestly. I mean, defending yourself can be seen as being mean, but you're just doing what you think is right for you. I don't know, I'm tired, I'm probably not making a whole lotta sense."

"I need to pee," Amiee said.

"Oh!" Gilly said, hopping up, "We can go use the outhouse! It's right out back, basically attached to the main hall! I'll take you!"

Gilly grabbed Amiee's arm and started to tug her off towards it, as Rachel handed Ella a piece of licorice.

"Oh...um, okay, thank you," Ella said, taking it and chewing gently, "Um...I like your earrings."

"Oh, thanks," Rachel said, pushing her hair back to reveal cute little kitty earrings, "I begged my mom to let me get my ears pierced for my last birthday and she finally let me do it. I was so happy, oh my god. It kinda stings at first and you have to use this gross watery stuff to keep it clean, but, whatever, it's worth it."

"My mom won't let me pierce my ears," Ella said, "She said maybe when I'm 14. I don't know why she doesn't let me do it, I mean it's not like she might even be..." Ella stopped herself, tears forming on her eyes, afraid to go on, "...she might not even be alive when I'm 14. Why wouldn't she want me to do that now, so she could see it."

"Sometimes, by like, keeping things static, people feel like the world won't change after they're gone," Rachel said, surprising Ella as she continued, "That's how my dad put it anyway. When my grandma got sick, my grandpa didn't do a single thing differently. He lived every day like they'd lived every day together their whole lives, because by keeping that same routine, I don't know, I guess it helps the dying person feel like the world won't be that different, and they won't miss that much, or something."

Ella wiped her eyes and nodded, chewing on the licorice a bit more, watching Rachel as she glanced around the inside of the main hall at all the other girls in groups. Rachel sighed and twisted some of her hair around her finger, licorice hanging out of her lips.

"Camp is the only place I can talk to other people," she finally said, "At school, it's not the same...thanks for being my friend, Ella."

That smile. That slight smirky smile, that same smile that caught Ella's eyes when they first met...her soft pink lips, the sort of pink Ella didn't know lips could naturally be, that pastel pink, and her long curved eyelashes. Everything about Rachel made Ella's heartbeat faster, made her chest tight, made her skin goosebump. All she could do was nod, and say "You're welcome."

Meanwhile, Gilly was standing outside of the outhouse, waiting for Aimee to finish.

"I wish I brought my telescope!" Gilly said, "The stars look really cool! I meant to bring it, but I forgot!"

"I'm standing right here," Aimee said, coming out and wiping her hands.

"Oh, heh, sorry," Gilly said, "Do you like stars?"

"I mean, I guess?"

"I've got those sticky ones on my ceiling at home, the ones that light up in the dark, you know? When I was little, my dad would take me into the backyard and teach me the constellations, and-"

"Gilly, I don't really care," Aimee said, stopping Gilly in her tracks, "I'm sorry, I just...I don't wanna hear about your amazing dad who teaches you about stars, okay, cause...cause it's not fair that you have that and I don't."

"You think my parents love me?" Gilly asked, her voice flat, taking Aimee by surprise, "You think everything at home is just magical for Ramona Gilly don't you? Oh yeah, look how happy she is! Look how bubbly she is! You know what you are? You're just a mean person. I've tried to be nice to you the entire time we've been here, and really, our home lives probably aren't much different, okay? You're not the only kid who's allowed to be unhappy, alright? God. I'm sorry for being your friend, I'll stop."

Gilly turned, arms crossed, and stormed off back into the main hall. As she passed through the crowd, she felt a hand on her shoulder and stopped to see Keegan standing there.

"Hey," she said, "Are you ok?"

"...I'm never okay," Gilly said, almost in tears, "I need...I need to talk to someone."

"I'm here, you can talk to me," Keegan said, smiling.

"No, I mean, I appreciate that, but no, you're not who I need to talk to," Gilly said, "Thank you though."

Gilly continued heading through the main hall, until she found Ella alone again. Gilly stood there over her, looking down, until Ella glanced up at her.

"Where's Aimee?" she asked.

"Where's Rachel?" Gilly asked.

"She went to talk to a friend," Ella said, "Are you okay?"

Gilly continued walking, but Ella stood up and followed her out of the main hall, into the stormy winds. Rain was starting to come down hard as Gilly stood out there, staring up at the sky. Ella cautiously joined her, getting soaked in the process, as thunder rolled overhead.

"Gilly?" she asked, "Are you sure we should be out here?"

"...I don't know what to do," Gilly said, crying, "If I try and make people like me, they don't, but they don't like real me either. Who do I have to be to make people finally like me?"

"I like you," Ella said, "And...and that's why I brought my fish, because ya know, pets...they never care who you are. They just care that you love them and feed them. I know Gordon likes you."

"Do you really like me?" Gilly asked, sniffling as Ella came to her side. Gilly turned and the girls faced one another, their hair blowing wildly in the wind.

"You're my friend," Ella said, smiling, "So yeah, I like you."

The two stood there, staring at one another for a while, until Ella finally took Gilly's hand and led her back into the main hall. Both girls had come here as loners, but despite anything else that was to come, they knew they'd always have eachothers backs.

Ella was standing in the girls bathroom, looking at herself in her one piece, running her hands down her tummy. She didn't like how she was changing. She didn't like this "puberty" thing. She didn't want to get older, to change, to look different. Everything was changing too damn fast. She heard the bathroom door open and saw Gilly come in behind her. Gilly, on the other hand, was in a cute frilly two piece, with her hair up in a braid. She picked up the camera hanging around her neck and snapped a picture of Ella as she was half turned to facing her.

"Hey!" Ella said.

"That's a keeper," Gilly said, laughing.

"You have a real camera, and not just a cell phone?" Ella asked and Gilly shrugged.

"I have both, I just like taking pictures different ways," she replied, "It's fun to try everything. Anyway, what's taking you so long? I don't wanna walk to the lake alone. Will you pleeeeease walk with me?"

"I don't know, I don't like how I look," Ella said.

"You look fine!" Gilly said, grabbing Ella's arm and tugging her, "Just come on!"

The girls headed out of the bathroom and down the hill towards the lake, hand in hand. With her free hand, Gilly fiddled with her camera while Ella watched from the corner of her eye. Ella felt weird, walking hand in hand with a girl she'd kissed mere nights ago, but...but she knew that lots of girls their age walked holding hands. It was just something girls could do. The whole BFF culture thing allowed them to do it without anyone seeing it as anything other than such.

"Do you wanna take pictures for a living?" Ella asked.

"Like as a job?" Gilly asked, putting her camera back around her neck, shrugging, "I don't know...I don't really feel like it's something I enjoy and most people don't enjoy their jobs, at least that's how it seems, and so like, why would I ruin something I like by getting paid to do it? Then it stops being fun. It stops being something you like to do and becomes something you have to do."

"That's a good way of thinking about it, I suppose," Ella said, just as they approached the lake and noticed Amie sitting by the side, not even in a swimsuit, just staring off at everyone in the water and enjoying themselves.

"You're not going to swim?" Ella asked, and then looked down at Amie's leg and continued, "Oh...right. I guess that wouldn't make much sense. You'd probably rust or something."

"Or just sink," Amie said, picking at the dirt in front of her, "Besides, I don't really like the water."

"Do you need someone to hold your camera?" Ryan asked, from his 'lifeguard' seat, holding his hand out as Gilly handed her camera to him and then waved goodbye as she raced towards the lake, leaping right in. Ryan shook his head, chuckling, and placed a label with her name on the camera and put it with the others in the pile to his side.

"I could sit with you if you want," Ella said, taking a seat beside Amie, "I don't really like swimming too much either. The only reason I took swim lessons was because my parents said it was important and I had to know, just in case I ever found myself drowning or something."

"Exactly," Amie said, "It's never something I'd do on my own accord."

Ella walked past her, and sat on the edge of the docks, looked around, cupped her hands and dipped them into the water. Once they were filled to the brim, she brought them up to her face and smelled the water, just to be sure.

"What're you doing?" a voice, half curious and half laughing, asked from behind. Ella quickly let the water fall back into the lake while she looked behind herself, seeing Rachel standing there, also in a one piece. Ella was so starstruck by the vision, she could hardly form words, but eventually managed to regain her composure.

"I...I'm...sniffing water," she said stupidly, but it did make Rachel laugh. Rachel sat down next to her and slid her legs into the water, kicking and making gentle currents.

"And why exactly are you sniffing water?" she asked.

"Well, I..." Ella started, but then realized she still didn't know this girl very well, and could she trust her if she told her about her fish? She looked at Rachel and swallowed her fear, continuing, "Um...do you wanna see something cool?"

"Always," Rachel said. Ella got up, took Rachels hand and pulled her away from the lake. As they headed back up the trail towards the cabin, Rachel tightened her grip on Ellas hand, making Ella blush. Rachel smirked. She clearly knew what she was doing. As they approached the cabin area, specifically Rabbit Cabin, Ella looked around, just to make sure there was nobody else around, and then snuck Rachel into the cabin behind her. As Rachel took a seat on the bed, Ella got on her knees and reached under the bed, pulling out her suitcase and opening it with the lid facing Rachel, so she couldn't see in.

"Well?" Rachel asked, and Ella spun the suitcase around.

"This is my fish," she said, "I brought him to camp with me in this. I was sniffing the lake water to see if I could put any of it in here with him, to make sure it was safe first before I did anything. I wouldn't wanna hurt him, ya know."

"For sure," Rachel said, getting on her knees next to Ella and looked into the suitcase with her. Ella took Rachels wrist and put it over the water in the briefcase.

"If you stick your finger in here, he'll kiss it," she said and Rachel laughed.

"Really?" she asked, before cautiously putting her fingertips in the water, and after a few seconds, felt the fish nibbling on them. She laughed again, pulling her hand out and then looked back at Ella, drying her hand on the back of her one piece, "So...why did you bring him?"

"I didn't wanna come to camp," Ella said, "I thought I was going to be lonely, and I didn't trust my parents enough to take care of him."

"Fair enough," Rachel said.

"I just wanted something familiar close to me," Ella said, "I've never really been away from home on my own like this for this long. I guess I was scared I'd be lonely or scared or something."

"I get that," Rachel said, "But you seem to have friends, like Gilly, and me, so you can't be doing too badly."

Ella blushed as Rachel pushed some of her hair behind her ear and looked at her fingernails. Ella couldn't stop thinking about the kiss she'd shared the other night, and how badly she wanted that from this girl. Rachel, with her long, curly black hair and her light brown eyes, her soft pink lips. Ella wanted nothing more than to reach out and kiss her, her heart racing faster than she thought possible. But before she could make any sort of move, the door opened and Gilly came in, dripping wet and plopped herself right down between them, looking into the suitcase as well.

"You have a fish?" Gilly asked.

"Yeah," Ella said, "I brought him from home so I wouldn't get lonely."

"What's his name?" Gilly asked.

"Gordon," Ella said, "I've had him for a few years. Gold fish aren't supposed to live that long, but he's still really peppy. He's my best friend. I was hoping the lake water would be good enough to fill the suitcase back up with."

"It should be, I mean, fish live in it," Gilly said.

"Yeah, but those are salt water fish, I don't think goldfish are salt water," Rachel said, and both Gilly and Ella looked disappointed before she added, "But, I'm sure the cafeteria has some good, clean water we could use!"

"I'll go see!" Gilly said, before turning and heading back out the cabin door. Ella and Rachel, alone again now, went back to looking at the fish, with Ella stealing glances at Rachel on and off. She was so pretty, she made Ellas heart skip a beat. The way the soft summer sunlight peaking in through the cabin blinds splintered across her face, lighting only certain areas, drawing attention to her soft lips...it made Ella quiver inside, like she'd never experienced beauty like this before, and likely never would again, so she should cherish this moment as long as she could. After a few minutes, Rachel turned and caught sight of Ella staring, and smirked.

"What?" Rachel asked, but Ella quickly looked away, embarrassed.

"...I wish I could be pretty like you," Ella mumbled, unsure now whether she was feeling attraction or just mere jealousy.

"You're pretty, in your own way. I know it's weird, being around a lot of other girls and wanting to feel like you're just as good looking, but society makes us feel so bad about our appearance and you shouldn't, because you're pretty too," Rachel said, "And I'm sure your fish here would agree."

Ella chuckled as Rachel laid her head on her shoulder, their fingertips touching on the floor between them. The door opened and Gilly came back in, putting a small pale of water on the floor before sitting down herself, and then picking it back up and starting to pour it a bit into the suitcase.

"There we go, a happy fish is a...well, a happy fish," Gilly said, "That's not right. A healthy fish is a happy fish. There we go. I knew I'd said that wrong."

The girls sat there and watched the fish swim around in his little suitcase for a bit, all discussing what they'd want to do when they headed back to the pool. Gilly was the first one to leave, really wanting to get some swimming in today. A few minutes after she headed out, Rachel stood up and straightened her hair before putting it up, and helping Ella back to her feet.

"What would you be doing this summer if you weren't here?" Ella asked, "Cause I'd probably just be sitting in my bedroom reading or scrapbooking or something."

"I'd be at my grandparents, up in wine country in California," Rachel said, "It's where I go every summer. I'm glad I didn't have to this time."

"Don't you like your grandparents?"

"My grandmother died this month. I only would've gone for her memorial service. I don't want any bad memories attached to that place, so I'm glad my parents sent me here instead," Rachel said, "Now come on, let's go swimming. This fish is making me jealous."

With that, the girls left, hand in hand, and headed for the water.

"What do you like to do at home?" Gilly asked, as she and Ella wandered through the woods on their free period hike, just the two of them, going somewhere completely unknown. As they stepped through a thicket, making sure they didn't scratch themselves on any rogue branches, Ella thought about the question.

"I don't know...I guess I like to read and make stuff. I make a lot of stuff for my dads garden," Ella said, "Birdhouses and stuff. I like making crafts. What about you?"

"Practicing dance," Gilly said brightly, "I love watching routines on youtube and trying myself, though I know I'll never have the chance to do it for any sort of audience. My parents, when they are around to dictate what I do, have me enrolled in far too many things as it is."

"Do you ever get any time to do whatever you want to do?" Ella asked, and Gilly nodded, chewing on her fingernails.

"Well, yes, I mean I do get some time to myself," Gilly said, "But even then I'm usually doing it alone, and not with any friends or anything."

Ella turned around and saw Gilly chewing on her nails. Ella let go of the branch she was holding out of their way and walked back towards Gilly, taking her hand and looking at her nails, chewed down to the bare fingertip.

"You know, if you put hot sauce on your nails, you won't bite them as much, unless you like hot sauce I guess," Ella said, "That's what my grandmother used to do to me."

Gilly looked down at Ella holding her hand, and then back up at Ella, her face blushing bright red. Ella was starting to notice, and inched closer to her, both of them breathing rather fast when suddenly the music rang out from behind the trees nearby, making them both jump. They both quickly hid behind a bush, down on their knees, catching their breaths and staring at one another, awaiting some more music.

And then it rang out again.

"What is that?" Ella asked, as Gilly crawled over to her bush.

"I don't know the tune, but I think the instrument is a melodica," Gilly said.

Ella pulled the bushes back and they peered through the leaves to see a girl standing in a clearing, indeed playing a melodica. She was barefoot, in a white lacy tank top and blue shorts, with long wavy black hair. Ella could've sworn this was the girl she'd been dreaming about, but she knew that wasn't how reality worked. Still...the resemblance was uncanny. Gilly nudged Ella in the ribs.

"She's really good at playing that," Gilly whispered, "Should we say hi?"

Ella nodded and started to head through the bushes. As she and Gilly approached, the girl stopped playing and smiled at them, waving. They returned the pleasant, friendly gestures as she sat down on a rock nearby the little stream she'd been standing in. Judging from her height, Ella guessed she must've been at least a year or so older than them.

"Hi," the girl said, "I'm Rachel. Are you two from Turtle Cabin?" Rachel asked as she started to clean off the end of the melodica with a handcloth.

"No, we're in Rabbit Cabin," Gilly said, "What're you doing out here?"

"Playing music. Why, is free period over? Did I miss the bell?" Rachel asked, starting to sound concerned.

"No, not at all, we just were on a hike and didn't expect to see someone else out here," Ella said, smoothing her skirt out, blushing, "Um...you're really good at playing that."

"Oh, well my entire school had to play the recorder in elementary school and so in middle school I joined band this year, but I don't wanna play the Flute all the time so I asked my dad for a Melodica, and I've just been playing this for fun."

Ella couldn't stand looking at this girl. Not because of the comparison she'd already made to the girl in her dream, but because she was so taken with her appearance. Her skin was smooth and fair, her long black hair was wavy and shiny, and her teeth when she smiled shone so bright they looked like tiny diamonds. Ella could feel her heart race every time she caught eyes with her.

"I play the piano!" Gilly said excitedly and Ella looked at her, her brow raised.

"You do?"

"Yep. Parents signed me up for classes when I was 6, and I've been playing ever since then," she said, smiling proudly, "But that's all. I can't play anything else. Melodicas are neat though, and you sound like you've been playing a while because you're really good."

"Thanks," Rachel replied happily, brushing her hair back out of her face, "So what're your names?"

"I'm Gilly, this is Ella," Gilly said, introducing them both as Ella waved her hand a bit and wiggled her fingers in a somewhat 'hello' response. Rachel's eyes locked with Ella's and Ella thought her heart was going to explode. They were dark green, and big with long curved lashes. She had to be at least a year or so older than them.

"Nice to meet you guys," Rachel said, "I was gonna head back and have lunch if you guys wanted some company."

"That'd be nice," Gilly said, and so Rachel packed up her backpack, threw it over her shoulders and the three of them headed back through the bushes, side by side. While walking, Ella continued to steal glances at Rachel, and after a bit noticed Gilly looking at her. When Ella looked at Gilly, she just looked away, seemingly somewhat sad or something.

"It's so nice and quiet out here," Rachel said, "The camp is always so loud, which is fine, that's what camp is for, but ugh, it's nice to get away from it. So you guys are from Rabbit Cabin huh? Rabbit Cabin's kinda cool I guess. I like their counselors. Charlie's really funny."

"Who's the leader of Turtle Cabin?" Ella asked, finally breaking her silence.

"Um, it's this guy named Beck. He's cool I guess, he's from New York and does like, gallery shows up there and stuff, so I guess his dad's super rich and owns an art gallery."

Just then a bird flew overhead through the trees ahead of them, and Gilly took off, holding the binoculars hanging around her neck steady as she tried to catch up with, disappearing into the bushes ahead of them. Ella now found herself alone with Rachel, but terrified to say anything, in case she embarrassed or bored her.

"So Ella, what do you like to do here?" Rachel asked.

"I...don't know..." Ella said, "Hike, I guess. I like how pretty it is, seeing animals and stuff. I usually stay in my room at home and read or look at fashion blogs or something. I don't really have any friends at home."

"That's okay, neither do I," Rachel said, and this surprised Ella.

"Really? But you're like...musical and...pretty and stuff," Ella said, making Rachel chuckle.

"Well, that doesn't mean you have friends. I just don't want any, I like being alone or being with my parents. I don't know. If people talk to me at school, they're nice and I will talk back to them, but usually I'd rather do my own thing. Boys give me attention because I'm pretty, but who wants that?"

"...what do you mean?" Ella asked.

"It's annoying, I don't want it, and they don't deserve my attention just for saying I'm pretty or something, as if that magically unlocks my romantic feelings for them. Besides, it's never nice, sweet stuff. It's always gross stuff. It's rude. Besides, boys are gross," Rachel said, "I mean, my cousin who's in elementary school says boys are gross too, but she doesn't mean it the way I do."

"...do...do you not like-" Ella started to ask, but then Gilly came crashing back through the bushes at them, waving her hands at them frantically.

"Guys! Come here! Come here!" she said, panting, nearly out of breath, before turning and tromping back through the brush, Rachel and Ella on her heels. As they crashed through the bushes and past the trees, she eventually lead them to a big tree where they saw Gilly starting to kneel over a bluejay, sitting on the floor, chirping quietly, one wing outstretched. Gilly reached out and started to pet its wing softly, looking at them and smiling.

"Wow," Rachel said, "He looks injured. We should wrap him up in something and take him back to camp so somebody there can do something for him. If we leave him out here, he'll just get eaten or something."

"Okay," Gilly said, taking her shirt off, wrapping the bird up safely and holding him close to her chest, "He's so soft and he makes the cutest chirps. I wanna keep him as a pet, but I know it's not fair to take him out of nature."

"Somebody at camp will know what to do," Rachel said, "They deal with hurt animals every summer."

The girls continued their trek back to camp. When they arrived, Gilly bid them goodbye and rushed off to the main office to inquire about the bird, while Rachel and Ella headed to the cafeteria. Ella looked at Rachel's hands and noticed her nails were painted soft pastel pink, and of medium length. She had a few bracelets hanging around her wrist that jingled as they walked.

"I like your haircut," Rachel said as they got in line to get their food, "It frames your face really well."

"Th-thank you," Ella said, stammering, blushing and Rachel smiled, "I like your bracelets," Ella continued.

"Oh, yeah! They're from my mom," Rachel said, holding her arm up a bit, "They're turquoise I think. It's my favorite color."

After getting their food plopped on their trays, Rachel grabbed Ella's hand and lead her out of the cafeteria and around to where the lake was. Ella didn't even know eating outside was allowed, but apparently it either was or they were breaking a rule. Rachel sat down on the dock and patted the wood next to her, prompting Ella to take a seat across from her, both of them sitting cross legged. Rachel started to eat while Ella remained too anxious and nervous to start eating, and all she could manage to do was watch Rachel eat. Her lips, and how....perfect they were.

"I like eating here," Rachel said, "Sometimes you'll see fish jumping, it's cool."

"Uh huh," Ella said, managing to nod a little before forcing herself to start eating. She couldn't get the feeling of Rachel's hand off hers the rest of the day. Laying in her bunk that night, staring at the ceiling above her, she kept replaying that first second seeing Rachel turn around in the clearing, the way the sun struck her face as it broke through the leaves overhead, and how fast her heart was beating. Gilly climbed up onto the bed and sighed, reaching into a bag of chips she had opened, shoveling them into her mouth.

"...Gilly, some girl when we first got here told me that...she told me to be careful around you because you've tried to kiss other girls at camp before," Ella said, and Gilly looked embarrassed, but she finished chewing and sighed.

"Yeah...well...don't worry, I won't try and kiss you," Gilly said.

"But...it's true?"

"Yes."

"...did you...did you think Rachel was pretty?" Ella asked, and Gilly shrugged, as Ella sat up on her elbows, looking at Gilly, "...I've been having dreams the last few weeks where I'm....where I....I kiss a girl, and then I wake up and it...when did you first wanna kiss a girl?"

"I guess it was like last summer," Gilly said, "That was the first time I did it anyway. It was during truth or dare, so it wasn't anything real, but I really liked it...I guess Rachel is pretty, but not like you are. Every girl is pretty in their own way."

Ella looked at her hands as Gilly set the chip bag to the side of the bed and crawled closer to her. Ella looked up, feeling that warm feeling again, like when she'd held her hands briefly in the woods earlier, and soon their faces were less than an inch apart and Ella could feel Gilly's breath on her skin. After a few seconds of looking at one another, Gilly put her hand behind Ella's neck, and kissed her. It only lasted for a minute or so, and after it ended, Gilly just sat back the way she was when she first got on the bed and continued eating chips.

"Well?" Gilly asked.

"...that was nice," Ella said, "I've never been kissed, so I didn't know what to expect. Also you taste salty from those chips and now I'm thirsty."

They both laughed as Ella got up and they sat on the bed, backs against the wall, eating chips and talking deep into the night about when they first started to like girls. Finally Ella didn't feel so alone about this, and it felt nice.

Maybe camp wasn't so bad after all.

Ella was asleep, dreaming of something safe and familiar, something she'd been dreaming about a lot lately, when she felt herself start to wake up. Her eyes fluttered open slowly, and into her blurry vision came the view of a blonde girl staring right at her from the side of her bed. This shook Ella awake completely, startled and confused. It turns out it was just Gilly, who appeared giddy as an only child on Christmas morning.

"You're awake!" she said happily, "We're going for a hike today!"

"What time is it?" Ella asked, wiping her eyes, as Gilly checked her watch.

"It's about eight in the morning, we aren't going for the hike until noon, but I wanted to get breakfast," Gilly said, and Ella, now sitting up and running her hands through her hair, looked a bit annoyed.

"You couldn't just get breakfast?" she asked.

"I...I didn't wanna go alone," Gilly said, and Ella could understand that. Gilly waited as Ella got up, woke up and got dressed in their camp uniforms, then headed out the cabin door and towards the main hall for breakfast. Gilly was almost skipping, so seemingly excited.

"How can you be this awake this early?" Ella asked.

"I like being up before everyone else," Gilly said, "It makes the world seem safe when you're the only one in it. Nobody can bother you or hurt you, everything is quiet and perfect."

It was hard to argue with her worldview, that was for sure.

                                                                                      ***

The girls got some fresh fruit, pancakes and Gilly made Ella have some coffee with her, exclaiming that "this was camp, and camp is where you try new things!". So she did, and surprisingly, she didn't hate it. As the girls sat at their table, eating their breakfast, Ella wasn't shocked to not see too many other people in the main hall this early. Just then, she felt someone sit on the other side of her, and glanced over to see Amie sitting there, holding a small plastic tupperware with her name lovingly written on it in cursive.

"You have breakfast too?" Ella asked.

"That's my mom for you," Amie said, "Sparrow Cabin is boring. What's Rabbit Cabin like?"

"It's okay I guess," Ella said, "I don't know why there's different cabins. Isn't camp supposed to promote the idea of teamwork and togetherness? How can you claim you're doing that when you're putting people in separate cabins and forcing them to compete against one another? You don't teach teamwork by forcing teams to work against other teams...that's not teamwork, that's just competition."

"I disagree, it teaches you to work with your own team, because you know not everybody in the world is going to like you or work with you, so you work with the people you do have," Gilly said, "At least that's how I've felt since coming here. But..."

"...what?" Amie asked.

"Well, I'm not one to know, really, since nobody ever wants me on their team," Gilly said, pushing her hair back behind her ear, and continuing to cut up her pancakes.

"Good morning ladies," Charlie said, "Getting your energy up for the hike?"

"There's a hike?" Amie asked.

"Yep, Rabbit Cabin & Sparrow Cabin are going for a hike together today. It may be a few hours long, so get as much food in you as you can, because you'll need the spare energy to burn. Once we reach our destination we will camp and make a campfire and stuff that people usually do at camp, but we need to get there first. Meet back at Rabbit Cabin after you're done eating. I don't want the troops mixed before we head out."

Charlie turned and headed to the breakfast line to get her own vitals, as Amie looked back at Gilly.

"A hike..." Amie repeated, sound rather unenthusiastic.

                                                                                      ***

"So what's your family like?" Gilly asked as they marched up a hill, aside their cabin members, the troops now mixed together for the hike.

"My dad is pretty cool I guess. He makes stuff for people, like, commercials and-"

"He's an ad man," Amie said, and Ella nodded.

"Yeah, that's it, an ad man. He works in advertisement. My mom is cool too, she illustrates childrens books," Ella continued, "But she hasn't been working a lot lately, she's been kind of sick. That's why they sent me to camp, was so they could have some time alone, maybe get her to feel better."

"I'm sorry," Gilly said, then turning to Amie, "What about your family?"

"I have no family," Amie replied, "I was raised in the wild by a pack of wolves."

"That's unrealistic, you'd be feral if that were true," Gilly said, "And you seem somewhat civilized, so I know it's a joke."

Amie actually cracked a bit of a smile and, while toying with her hair, said, "Well, my stepdad wants me to be more social, and my mom really needs him to support us. She lost everything in the divorce, and she doesn't make enough to support us, so...my stepdad doesn't like that she has a kid, but oh well. He's gonna have to put up with me."

"You don't know that he doesn't like you," Ella said, "Every kid thinks that their-"

"No, he told me," Amie interrupted, causing Gilly and Ella to give eachother a nervous look, both rather surprised by this truth. The girls didn't talk much the rest of the hike. Meanwhile, Charlie and the Sparrow Cabin leader, a young, thin man with short black hair, named Ryan, were walking well ahead of the girls.

"I really didn't want to have to do this again," Charlie said, hands in her pockets, kicking rocks as she walked watching the ground, "I really thought that by this summer, I'd have everything figured out and that I'd be somewhere nice and have my work finished and I'd have my life started, but nope, here I am, once again, at Camp Kill Yourself."

"I know it's not ideal, but hey, I mean, at least it's a job. You are getting paid," Ryan said, "That's more than most people who can't get on their feet end up with. They can't even find unpaid internships. You at least have employment, and for the summer, you have a roof over your head and some food to eat."

"Don't give me the whole 'it can always get worse' routine, dude, because I know it can always get worse. The problem isn't that it could get worse, it's that it never gets better or gets worse. Stagnation is far more frustrating than failure, in my humble opinion. At least with failure, you know you failed, you can move on and try again. But with stagnation, with not knowing...that's annoying. You're scared to make any move, lest the move you make be the wrong one that makes everything a thousand times worse," Charlie said, and Ryan nodded, handing her a water bottle.

"You do have a point," Ryan admitted, "Well then how about we abandon the whole 'it can get worse' idea and instead embrace a new idealogy, the 'it can get better' belief system? Instead of thinking about how much worse things could get, how much further down the rung of societies ladder you could fall, instead think about how much better it will get once you're done here. How far up that ladder you'll climb instead? I think that's fair."

"You're a real optimist, and frankly it's disgusting," Charlie said, smirking, making Ryan blush.

They eventually reached their destination, a spot at the camp called "Roys Peak". It was a small clearing on the top of a mountain hike. Ryan and Charlie started setting up tents and making a campfire, as the girls got used to their overnight campsite. Gilly sat by herself on a log, braiding her hair a bit while Amie and Ella took in the scenery. Amie was looking at an anthill while Ella knelt beside her, just watching her interact with the ants.

"You didn't mean that did you? About your step dad hating you?" Ella asked.

"I did. He loves my mom, and I like him for that because my mom is great and she deserves it, but he...he might not hate me, but he wishes they could have their own child, and that she hadn't had a child already," Amie said.

"...do you think they'll have a child?" Ella asked, and Amie just shrugged. Meanwhile, Charlie and Ryan were working on getting the campfire made. Charlie had set up most of the tents and, being somewhat wary of fire, had decided to let Ryan handle that part. The both of them kneeling around the campfire while Ryan tried to get it getting, Charlie couldn't help but snicker at his short comings.

"Did you ever camp as a kid?" she asked.

"Yes, I did. It's just that my parents didn't exactly ask their children under 10 years of age to start fires, so forgive me if I'm a little slow on the uptake," Ryan said, just as the fire caught to the leaves and he cheered for himself. Charlie patted his back as she stood back up.

"Good job, we're all proud of you. Alright, girls, gather 'round, okay?" she called out, getting all the girls to come sit on the logs surrounding the campfire, "Now, this is camp, which obviously means traditions like smores and ghost stories and all that usual camp fare, but we also are here to teach you self worth and confidence, which is why every summer, on the first hike, we each go around and mention something we like about ourselves."

Charlie sat on a log and pointed across the campfire at a girl with short black hair and a freckled face.

"Melissa, why don't you start?" she asked.

"I guess I like how good I am at school. Everyone in my class is always asking for my help with homework and stuff, because I keep my notes so organized," Melissa said, "Makes me feel important." As she finished she looked at the girl sitting next to her, who had long dark brown hair and a toothy smile.

"I like that I taught myself an instrument last year. I saw this kid on youtube who could play bass, and I decided I wanted to do that too, so I asked my parents to get me one and they did for my birthday, so I taught myself, and I'm hoping to join a band next year!" As she finished, she looked at Ella, who stumbled for her words, but quickly caught herself.

"Uh, I...I like...how good I am at meeting people. I don't really like meeting people, but the fact that it comes easily for me...I don't know, it makes things easier, I guess? It makes things not so awkward. I still don't like meeting people, but at least it's easy for me," Ella said, and then looked at Gilly, who was sitting between her and Amie. Gilly didn't really talk at first, and then after a moment, she sighed.

"I don't really like anything about myself," she said quietly, "I wish I could, but I can't, because my parents don't like anything about me, if and my parents can't like anything about me, then why should I."

Nobody really said anything for a moment, and then the confessions went on. As Gilly looked at her shoes, kicking her feet gently against the log, she felt Ella's hand gripping hers, hiding them under her thigh so nobody would see. Gilly sort of glanced at her, half smiling, half blushing.

                                                                                   ***

Laying in the tent that night, Ella couldn't sleep. Gilly had gotten up to pee, but hadn't come back in yet, leaving the tent flap half opened. Ella finally got out of her sleeping bag and unzipped the flap the rest of the way, climbed out of the tent and zipped the flap back up. She turned and immediately caught sight of Gilly sitting on the log in front of the campfire, still going strongly. She had a stick and was poking it from time to time. Ella came up behind, stepped over the log and took her seat beside Gilly.

"Hey, are you ok?" Ella asked.

"Yeah," Gilly said, pulling her blanket up around her shoulders, "I just don't like that game. Charlie makes us do it every year, and I never have anything good to say about myself."

"It's ok," Ella said, "...it's ok if your parents don't like you. I like you."

"Thanks, I like you too," Gilly replied, smiling.

Ella laid her head on Gilly's shoulder, and they sat like that well into the night, just watching the flames licking the sweet camp air.

Ella had to admit...the camp was beautiful, just as Gilly said it would be. When the bus pulled in over the old wooden bridge, cozy and nestled by treetops overhead, she really did start to actually feel like this summer might be good after all. The bus came to a complete halt, and the doors opened. A young woman, appearing to be in her mid to late twenties or early thirties stepped on board, in full scout uniform, holding a clipboard. She had the most bored, uninterested look on her face.

"Okay, hello girls, I'm Charlie Robinson, and I'm the leader of Rabbit Cabin. I'm going to call off some of your names, and if I call your name, it means you will be in Rabbit Cabin. If you're called, please grab your things, step off the bus and stay by the bus. I will be with you when I've gotten everyone."

The girls chattered excitedly, as Charlie held up the clipboard and cleared her throat. She sounded like she was sick or something.

"Alright, Jeanie McQueen," she started, as a girl with dark oak colored hair got up, grabbed her things and walked off the bus. As Charlie continued to call off name after name, and girl after girl followed suit off the bus, Gilly turned back around in her chair and looked at Ella.

"This is so exciting! We might be in the same cabin!" she said, nearly bouncing up and down.

"That would be so exciting, I can't even contain myself," Amie said dryly, making Ella snicker a little to herself. Gilly smiled, clearly not recognizing Amie's comment, and turned back around on the seat face forward. Charlie continued, and when it got to a good size group gone, she finally read the last names on her list.

"Ella Fitzroy and Ramona Gilly," she finished off, taking a sip from her canteen. Gilly giggled excitedly as she got up and grabbed her things. Ella looked at Amie, who looked completely crestfallen. As she reached down to grab her suitcase, she looked at Amie again and smiled.

"Well," Ella said, "We can still see eachother at breaks and stuff!"

Amie forced a smile, but Ella could tell it didn't really please her. Gilly took Ella's wrist and nearly dragged her off the bus with her, almost gliding along ecstatically. As they got off the bus and stood by the side, waiting for the rest of their bags and their new cabin leader, Gilly just couldn't contain her excitement. She looked all around, but babbled endlessly to Ella.

"We can stay up and tell ghost stories and stuff after the rest of the cabin has fallen asleep, oh this'll be so much fun! Now, do you want the top bunk or the bottom bunk? I don't really mind, in fact, I have a bit of a fear of heights, so if you take the-"

"I'll take the top, yeah," Ella said, and Gilly clapped happily. Charlie finally came off the bus and passed by another young woman with her own clipboard, heading onto the bus. Charlie looked at the girls, sighed heavily and waved her hand, as if trying to indicate to them to follow her. Gilly took Ella's hand, and some luggage in her other hand and started following Charlie.

"So, who's first time at camp is this?" Charlie asked, walking backwards so she could face the girls. A number of hands raised up, but it wasn't many, and Charlie counted for a moment, "Okay...yeah that sounds about right. Most of you I recognize from last summer. Well, I'm counting on you returning campers to help the new girls to acclimate to the whole thing. It's a little weird at first, but you'll get the hang of it."

"I'm already helping one of them," Gilly said, holding up Ella's hand, and Charlie smirked.

"That's good, Gilly. Well done," Charlie replied, "Alright girls, I'll explain the rules when we get to the cabin. Let's just get there first so I don't run out of breath, 'cause I'm not in the best shape despite running a summer camp cabin."

Some of the girls laughed as Charlie turned back around and they continued on towards the cabin. Once inside, Gilly picked out a bunk for herself and Ella, and they put their luggage down. Ella slid her suitcase with her fish under the bottom bunk, and then sat on the bunk when Gilly plopped down beside her. Ella watched the other girls putting their luggage away, and then looked at Gilly for a moment.

"I knew your friend was being sarcastic," Gilly said suddenly, taking Ella by surprise with her change of tone, "I'm not stupid. I know she didn't like me. I'm kind of glad she isn't in the cabin though, because if she were, you two would be friends, and I'd be alone again all summer."

This token of reality took Ella completely by surprise. She hadn't expected Gilly to be so somber. She had known girls like Gilly at school; perky and bubbly and overachievers but a lot meaner too. She'd never met someone like that who was nice, who had depth, like Gilly had. It was almost as if her cheery persona was nothing but a front, a mask, to hide who she really was from everyone else for fear they really didn't like her. If they didn't like the bubbly version of her, how could they like the real version?

"Well," Ella said, "I...I'm glad we're bunkmates then."

Gilly looked at Ella and smiled warmly, genuinely, not the fake smile she'd had plastered on all morning. Just then, Charlie called the girls into the cabin foyer and told them to hang out for a minute so she could get a list. When she came back, she put on some reading glasses.

"Alright, so for those who're new here, here's a short list of the things you shouldn't do. Some of these are super obvious, like, no late night hikes without supervision, stupid things like that. No swimming without a counselor present. Listen, I've actually printed out copies of this thing, and you can all read them yourselves, yeah? Saves me the trouble. You should all be literate, I take it," Charlie said, "Keegan, can you hand these out please?"

A girl with short black hair took the papers and started passing them out to all the other girls. Gilly took one but immediately folded it up neatly and slipped it into her shirt pocket, patting it gently.

"I have it all memorized up here," she said, pointing at her head, "Stick with me and you'll do fine."

"Good to know," Ella said.

The rest of the first day was the girls to have, to get settled in and ready for the coming activities. Ella and Gilly spent it outside, sitting under a big elm tree while Gilly made a flower crown. Ella just picked at the dirt in the soles of her shoes, trying not to think about what her parents were doing back home.

"Did your parents send you here to get rid of you too?" Ella asked, "That's what my parents did."

"I don't know, I haven't seen my parents in months," Gilly replied, tying one flower stem to another tightly.

"What?"

"Mhm," Gilly said, pushing some hair back behind her ear, "They went to France for business, and I haven't seen them since then. I've been staying with my nanny."

"...wow," Ella said, "Don't you miss them?"

"How can I miss people who're never there?" Gilly responded, quite sternly, as if she'd been asked that before. Ella sensed a feeling of bitterness under those words, so she dropped the whole thing. After another minute, Gilly finished the crown and put it on top of Ella's head.

"There!" Gilly said, "That looks wonderful! I'm a true fashion diva!"

Ella got up and walked over to the nearby lake, leaning over to look in at her reflection, and smiled. It was actually very pretty, and looked very nice on her. Gilly came and stood beside her, both of them looking at Ella's reflection before Gilly pointed at a rowboat in the lake.

"Look at that," she said, and Ella and she turned to look at the rowboat, filled with a few boys and a guy who looked around Charlies age.

"Must be from the boy camp," Ella said.

"There's a boy camp?" Gilly asked.

"I just assumed, I mean, we have one, so why wouldn't there be?" Ella asked, and Gilly blushed.

"I never thought that we might have a boy camp nearby," she said, "It's never even occurred to me that that was a possibility. How exciting."

Just then, the dinner bell rang, and the girls were all called into the main hall for dinner. Sitting at the long tables in the main hall, stirring her peas with her fork, Ella just couldn't figure out what this feeling she felt was. Maybe isolation? But could you be isolated while still surrounded by people? She wasn't sure. Maybe this was what independence felt like; being away from your parents and all. Maybe. Maybe it was-

"Excuse me?" a girl asked from behind, and Ella looked around to see a black girl standing behind her, about a year older than her.

"Yeah?" Ella asked.

"I'm just letting you know, be careful around that Gilly girl," the girl said, "She's tried to kiss other girls at the camp before, and I didn't want you to be surprised by it. I'm just looking out for you."

Ella looked a bit to the right, where Gilly was standing giddily in line, waiting for her food and talking to a girl who didn't even appear to be slightly interested. Ella looked back at the girl and nodded.

"Tha-thanks," Ella said, "I'll...uh...I'll make sure to be aware of that."

"Of course," the girl said, smiling, before heading back to her own table.

Lying on the top bunk of her bed that night, her open suitcase laying on her chest, her finger in the water while her fish nibbled at it, Ella couldn't help but replay that scene over and over again in her head. She looked down at the bunk below her, where Gilly was fast asleep, sucking on the tip of her thumb, and she blushed. Ella shut the suitcase and then covered her face with her pillow.

She'd been right all along.

This summer was going to suck.

Ella Fitzroy didn't want to go to camp.

She didn't want to spend her summer around her peers, she already spent all school year with them, and she didn't want to have to participate in "team games" and she didn't want to have to be told what to do all summer by adults who weren't even her parents, or in some cases, only a few years older than her. But Ella Fitzroy was 12 and 12 year olds rarely get what they want. So, on the second week of her summer vacation, Ella Fitzroy packed her bags and got up in the morning to be driven to the drop off point, where the parents took their students for the camp bus pick up.

Sitting in the passenger seat of her fathers car, her luggage in the back behind her, she found herself just staring annoyed out the window, watching the cars go by them, knowing full well all the other kids she was seeing weren't being shuttled off to camp for the summer.

"You know," Martin, her father, said as he adjusted his rearview mirror as traffic idled, "You can write or call to us. We aren't going to be unable to talk to you. You're not going to be completely cut off or something, if that's what you're afraid of. They have post at camp, or at least they did when I went to camp."

"Why do I have to go?" Ella asked.

"It's character building. Teaching you how to get along with other kids, teamwork and stuff like that. You don't really do any extra carricular activities at school or any clubs or groups or anything. We think this'll be good for you, that's all. It's not about us not wanting you around or something."

"Forcing me to be around other kids isn't going to make me like them any more. If anything, it's just going to make me like you guys less for making me do this," Ella said meekly, "I don't want to hate you and mom."

"You're going to be back in a few weeks, sweetie, it won't be that bad, okay?" Martin asked, tossing her hair with his hand, smiling warmly at her. She did smile back, despite her annoyance at the whole situation. Maybe her father was right, maybe it wouldn't be too bad, and she would only be gone for a few weeks. Besides, she wouldn't be totally alone. She'd have her fish.

At the drop off point, her father gave her a hug and a kiss, told her to have fun and that he'd be back to get her in a few weeks. As she boarded the bus, among a dozen or so other girls, she couldn't help but feel completely out of place. These were girls who wanted to be going. Girls in t-shirts and shorts, girls who played sports and enjoyed hiking and camping. Ella liked the outdoors all well and fine, but she wasn't one of those girls. She liked to be inside more than out, liked the quiet, liked pretty clothes, not utilitarian clothes. She was completely out of place, but thankfully nobody was going to bring it to attention.

Ella took a seat in the back of the bus, with her old plastic suitcase on her lap, having refused to put it under the bus hatch with the rest of the luggage. As she sighed and ran her hand across the top of the suitcase, she heard something and looked to the seat across from her in the back, where a girl with leg braces had taken a seat. She watched this girl, with frizzy curly brown hair, dressed in a pastel blue blouse and a grey skirt, open the paper bag she had put on her lap after sitting and pulling out a small plastic container. The girl lifted the lid off gently and started eating apple slices, only noticing Ella watching her after a moment.

"Do you want one?" she asked, her somewhat buck front teeth giving her a bit of a lisp.

"I'm ok, thanks," Ella said, and the girl shrugged and just went back to eating apple.

"I have other stuff," the girl said, digging through the bag, "I also have some cheese and grapes and some meat. I think it's ham. My mom packed me snacks for the ride."

"...can I have some cheese?" Ella asked, and the girl smiled, nodded and opened another container, handing her some cheese blocks. Ella took them and ate one or two of them, before taking a moment to look at the other girls on the bus.

"You don't wanna be here either huh?" the girl asked.

"Not really," Ella said, "I didn't realize it was that obvious."

"I wanted to stay home for the summer," the girl said sheepishly, looking at her apple slices, rolling them around within the container, "...but my stepdad said it would be good for me, but really he just wanted to take my mom on vacation without being stared at."

"Stared at?" Ella asked, popping another cheese cube in her mouth, as her eyes made their way back down to the leg braces, "Oh...okay. That's kind of mean."

"It's not my fault," the girl said, "I can't help how I am. I didn't ask for this, but he sure treats me like I did....your suitcase is dripping."

Ella looked at one corner of the suitcase, and got scared for a moment. She pulled off the little backpack she had and pulled out a roll of duct tape. She ripped off a few pieces and put it over the corner where the leak was coming from. The girl watched, endlessly fascinated as to why a suitcase was seemingly full of water. After Ella had put the tape back into the backpack, she looked at the lid of the suitcase and sighed.

"...is your suitcase full of water?" the girl asked.

"...I brought my fish," Ella said, lifting the lid just a bit and showing the girl her fat goldfish swimming happily around in the suitcase full of water, then she shut it and locked it again, "I didn't want to be alone."

"Maybe we'll end up in the same cabin," the girl said, smiling a little, "Then you won't be alone. I'm Amie by the way."

"Ella," Ella replied, "Thanks for the cheese."

It would be about a 3 or 4  hour bus ride to the camp, but at least Ella had Amie to talk to, and of course, she had her fish. After a bit of quiet time, some of the girls started reading, quietly chatting or falling asleep. Amie had started reading as well, while Ella just sat and looked out the window. Suddenly, a bright bleach blonde head popped up over the back of the seat in front of Ella and stared at her. Ella jumped a little, surprised.

"I'm sorry," the girl said, "I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's ok," Ella said.

"I'm Ramona Gilly. You can call me Gilly. Everyone else does," the blonde said, talking fast and high pitched, "What's your names?"

"I'm Ella," Ella said, "And that's Amie," she added, pointing at Amie, who hadn't even looked up from her book. Gilly smiled at them both, then started sniffing the air a bit, her brow furrowing, like she was a dog trailing a criminals scent.

"I smell cheese," she said.

"That was me," Amie said, then quickly added, "Not, like...not fart wise, I mean, I brought cheese."

Ella laughed and Gilly looked at Amie, shuffling to the seat in front of Amie, looking at her.

"Can I have some?" she asked, and Amie sighed, then reached into her bag and pulled out the container again, giving Gilly a few blocks. Gilly thanked her and then started eating them, still staring at the bag, adding, "You brought snacks?"

"My mom made me snacks."

"But there's food at the camp," Gilly said, "Is this your first time going? 'Cause I've been there lots of summers."

"It's our first times," Ella said, holding firmly to the lid of the suitcase as the bus rode over a bump, "We've never been. We don't really want to go either."

"But it's great!" Gilly said joyfully, "I mean, the place is great, it's not so good...like...doing team stuff and stuff but the place is a lot of fun and it's really pretty. I'll show you some cool stuff to do there! Maybe we'll end up in the same cabin, that'd be great!"

"That sounds neat," Ella said, trying to be polite, but really tired of talking at this point, especially to someone so bubbly and peppy and full of spunk. Gilly looked back and forth between them and shrugged.

"Ok well, thanks for the cheese," she said to Amie, "Bye."

And she disappeared back into her seat. Ella sighed and leaned her head back as Amie chuckled to herself. Ella looked across the row at her.

"What?" Ella asked.

"Just...people like that," Amie said.

"Oh...yeah," Ella said.

She liked this Amie girl. She could tell she'd at least have one friend this summer. After a while, Ella herself fell asleep as the bus was starting to head into deep wooded areas, and the trees blocked all sunshine. She soon found herself in a dream, standing on a pier on a lake, watching another girl in front of her at the end of the pier just look out at the water. After a few moments, the girl turned around and smiled at her, the sunlight glinting her eyes, making them sparkle. Ella found she couldn't move, her feet were stuck to the pier by glue or some force of nature, and as the girl approached her, her long black hair flowing in the wind, Ella found herself wanting to do nothing more but turn and run. Run far far away. Finally, the girl reached her, looked at her, touched her cheek and then kissed her. Ella woke up, trying to breath, her nails scratching the lid of her suitcase. She opened the lid and looked at her fish, who just was swimming in circles. She put her index fingertip into the water and he swam over to it and started nibbling on it, giving her little fish kisses.

It helped, but it didn't make her forget about the dream. What really bothered her about the dream wasn't that she had it.

It was that she'd been having dreams like this for weeks now.